Sentosa

I wake up at 12pm and have a breakfast bought by my parents. Sam call me to join him to go Sentosa later. We meet at 2pm at harbourfront MRT station. Then we go to Guardian Pharmacy as Sam wants to buy sunblock lotion because he is on medication for his skin and he cannot be afford to have extreme suntan or even sunburnt.

He is quite shocked to realise that the sunblock lotion costs $20++ . He is definitely going to use it sparingly. We also buy two large bottle of distilled water at 70c each. Then we go to provision shop to buy soem bread and tidbits before aboarding the bus.

After buying the tickets, we queue for the blue line bus to the beach. Amazingly, even at 3pm, there are so many people coming to Sentosa island. We enjoy the tidbits first while waiting.I sms Bunawar whether he wants to join us to the fashion show tonight since we have extra invite.

Esjay: I wish I can work here at Sentosa?
Sam: Yeah , but why?
Esjay: I think they have the coolest uniform, like those at Bossini.
Sam: yeah.

Then we stop at Tanjung Beach nearby and walk to Tanjung Beach to check out the event being held there. Then we stop at the tram stop to wait for the arrival of the tram. The weather is damn warm. Luckily, we manage to get the seats at the tram. We just enjoy the ride and scenery at the beach.

Check out the hairband :P

We skip going to km8 bar because there are no girl accompanying us today. We alight at Mahalo beach and walk along the beach and then we cross over bridge to the small island and just chill out there. We just a dip and enjoy the tranquility even though opposite us is the ever happening sunset bay.

I enjoy the moments for while until some idiot's dog swim towards me. That dog is damn big, similar to wolf's size. I get freaked out. Of course, people around me are laughing their head off.

I receive sms from unknown number:
xxxxxxxx:Hi...Surpise...!Me with Bee lan now..What do u wan us to buy for u from Shanghai? U can reply to Beelan's Singaporre no.
Esjay ( ponders who ):Hui Hui with Bee lan? or Hung Yong w bee lan....hmmm a shade and a nice tee v neck.
xxxxxxxx:Beelan and hengyong lah...We'll try to find...beelan going back next thurs...
Esjay:She better do...U choose good one tee..ME still find job..ask bl to sms me when back to sg...Nice to hear from u both...Miss u guys..

I do not know that I can very mushy.

Anyway, I am anticipating someone's reply but then people still want to act diva again and don't bother to reply back. If he can reply to David's sms at fast rate but not even mine, worse don't bother to reply, I guess that I am taking his friendship seriously. I know what to do next. What goesa round, comes around. One does not live alone in this world.

There will be the time that one has to pay for his crimes.

Then, we wait awhile to dry up before going to palawan beach to have our bites at 7-Eleven stores. There arre so many beautiful young babes hanging around that area. After that, we take a bus to Tanjung Beach to take the shower there. Apparently, taking shower at the cubicle is horrible. The water is dripping slow. I rather take shower outside in open air.

Sam also complains that he does not even feel that he has already showered. We just wash away the sand and dirts only. Plus, it is very crowded at the toilet. Never take shower at 5.45 to 6pm. This is the time when people want to go home.

Trying to be japboy

The queue is super long at departure area. Then we take train to Dhoby Ghaut. Sam goes back home to shower before meeting me later to attend the NUM fashion show while I walk to Raffles place to have my dinner there. Apparently Burger King Restaurant closes at 7pm, hence I eat fish flipper meal at McDonalds restaurant.

I wait for more that one hour for Sam to meet me. Something is wrong when he does not reply my sms. I bet he takes a nap which is true. Then I meet him at Clarke Quay at 9.15pm. We go to Liang court since Sam has not have his dinner yet. We have dinner at Mcdonald's restaurant

Sam: Can you stop wearing that headband? You look like a girl.
Esjay: I can't help it when my hair is damn long now.
Sam: It looks horrible on you.
Esjay: I feel sexy to be androgynous.
Sam rolls eyes.

As usual, I am always conscious of people's comments, especially good comments. Hence I go to toilet , apply Gatsy's wax and comb side-parting. The image looks weird but heck care.

Then we walk to Club Momo. I manage to go in despite wearing sandals. We have goodies bag.

Zirh products.

Happy.

The problem with Fashion show is that the organizer will purposely delay the showtime for 15minutes to 30 minutes so that the dancefloor will be filled up. Those motherfuckers who think being late is very fashionable come with attitude and then sneak to the front to get the betetr view.

To hell with these monkeys.

While waiting, I notice so many people are wearing NUM clothes. I am not sure whether they are the friends of the owners who think it is courtesy to wear their products or they just want to be related to NUM and sit at VIP tables or just wear because they like the clothes. That's why I do not wish to buy their products because it is not exclusive at all.

At 11pm, the show starts with a drags dancing and miming. I realise that it is not sexy to be andrognyous after all. *laugh*
Then there are some game where 5 hunks have to parade and dance with their tops off. What shock me and Sam is that two of the participants only 20 and 18 years old and they are so beefy. What is wrong with these people ? They don't even look like they are of their own age but older.

Then we skip the fashion show and leave the club momo since Sam needs to work tommorow. We take cab home but along the way, I ask Sam to drop me at Buona Vista MRT station because I have not enough cash to continue the journey home.

Thanks goodness, there is still train services.

Sam: What's wrong with them? They look so old.
Esjay: Well, they gym hard to get that killer bod, hence they look slightly mature.
Sam: Must be the proteins they consume. Too much.
Esjay: yeah, What's wrong with them?

Saturday nite

I spend my whole day burning CD for Lily , which I think my ibook is burning hot due to continuous burning of CDs. I think Lily will be surpised to receive so many CDs from me, including two compilations of CDs by me. I just hope she likes it.

There is major activity at California Gym: Cycling class ( claimed as the Asia's largest cycling class being held ). HEnce no ABT class. Luckily Lily asks me whether I am keen to attend Bodypump by Collin later which I am. I am just a little bit skeptical because it is Saturday and it will be conducted at studio 2 ( which is smaller size ).

I quickly rush to Orchard when Samuel calls me. I am surpised that he wants to join me for bodypump at California gym as long as I have free pass. I meet him at the entrance at 5.15pm. I am so paranoid because I don't want to be late for the class.

We are being introduced to James, the sale consultant since the girl, Winnie I am looking for has quitted. He is nice enough to let us attend the class first. We change fast and wait by the door till the hip hop class is over. I manage to see Lily enjoying in the class. Once the class ends, we all rush into the class like some fanatics and start taking the board to secure the space.

Yvonne is with lily today and it's her first time ( again ) for the class. I introduce lily and Yvonne to Sam and vice versa. The place is fully crowded. The achievement I do today is doing squat with 40lbs. It feels good to feel the pain on my thighs.

I just want to have nice and big legs.

Sam quits halfway during the class because he took a meal before meeting me. He can feel the meal he had earlier, coming out from his system. The class by Collin is quite easy compared to Tony.

I want to attend the body combat class first before meeting David but Samuel does not that keen to attend while Lily has to attend a birthday dinner with her close friends at Ang Mo Kio.

We just shower and leave early. We have dinner at S11 at Cuppage centre. I just have Tom yam noodle while Samuel has his fish noodle soup. Then we shop at Bossini and then at Cold Storage.

We decide to buy the drink here since the drink at S11 foodcourt is exhorbitantly high. The drinks we get are on the shelf and hence not cold. We decide to put our drinks at the ice-cream cooler/freezeer first to chill while browsinga round for some tidbits. We come back to collect our drinks and line up for the payment. We realise that there is cooler that stores the chilled drinks beside the express counter. Samuel checks the price and he does not want to pay extra 15c for the coolness.

We are damn dumbings. That's sweet.

Then we go to HMV to check out the new store: Garcon. There are no much variety of clothes there. I wills tick to Re- shop for clothes. Samuel persuades me to go to NUM store to window-shop. I am not that excited to go there.

We just browse around. I say hi to Kevin, the sub-owner of the store. The clothes here are damn expensive.Actually, I do not buy NUM products not because of the price but because almost everyone has NUM products and I do not wish to be caught wearing a same clothing as other stranger.

No originality.

Then we are approached by the young sale assistant there to pass the free invites for the NUM fashion show for their new lines of clothing for summer tommorow. Being good-looking does have perks.

*thick-skinned*

Then Kevin come personally to us and say hi. I am so interested in his green flip-flop. Then he personally bring us to the other store and serve. Talking about being treated like celeberities, being served by one of the owner.The customers and the sale assistants are curious about us.

*thick-skinned*

I: U have so many stores at HMV, You must be rich now.
Kevin: No lah, we only have small stores, but not like we are owning the whole Heeren and that is considered rich.
I: Truly

Then after that, I get the call from David to meet him now since he already fetch his engineering associates from overseas from Changi Airport. We meet David who has his dinner first. I introduce him to Sam and vice versa.David tells me that Bunawar is at Holland Village with his friends. I bet David can enjoy my company.

It has been a long time he clubs, even with me. He enjoys himself with me and Sam.The good thing about Sam is that he can easily click with my friends and make my friends feel at ease. I am glad there is not awkward silence between any of us.

Party is a blast.

Then around 2.30am, we head for supper. We share murtabak , yeah three of us share a plate of murtabak. Plus, I break my rule of losing weight : Do not eat after 8pm.

Then we take taxi home.

quiz

Your view on yourself:

You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:

You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:

You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
The seriousness of your love:

You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?
Your views on education

You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.
The right job for you:

You have many goals and want to achieve as much as you can. The jobs you enjoy are those that let you burn off your considerable excess energy.
How do you view success:

You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.
What are you most afraid of:

You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.
Who is your true self:

You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve

http://quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx

Third day of Detox

Apparenly I give up my detox diet. I need solid food now.It can be be strange that I do not go to toilet to shit for two days, except a lot of pissing. However, I still stick steamed vegetables and fish fillet for the meal for a day.

I go fo the bodycombat class, and then bodypump by Toni after that. It is very crowded today. Quite a number of guys attend the class. As usual, they carry heavy weights but it is time for push-ups, they just cannot do it well.

I just hate show-offs ( who try hard ).

Then I do some cooking for myself. No frying and other fatty foods, still. I do not want to shock my body system.

second day of detox

I wake up LATE again. I feel a little lethargic and tired. The cool weather does not help to make me wake up . I skip my yoga this morning. I have my morning drink : pineapple, papaya and strawberry. It tastes nice.

Then constantly, I have warm water infused with slice of lemon.

I can feel headache is coming and and it is coming bad. Things start quite slowly. But somehow, my mother who just don't understand the process of detoxicifation. She really makes me fumed almost every time which I suppose to do.

She just don't get it. Worse, she keeps bugging me at any slightest thing I do. There goes my process. To be quiet and at peace. My headache is getting worse too. I just tell her off that I will move out of the house and live by myself.

Who cares if she gets hurt? I have my own life.

Then I go n blend the vegetables :purple cabbage, cabbage, kale, spinach, apple, cucumber, brocolli and carrot. Then i start to take sip with this green drink, I start to vomit. It taste really horrible. I give drinking raw vegetable. I think I shall just juice the ingredients. Hence I make another drink : Green apple and cucumber.

I am finding purpose in my life but there some issue i keep thinking every minutes: When am I going to get a job search seriously? I nearly lose faith and give up this process, especially when my mum just purposely cooks good food sinc emy sister is coming back tonight.

It is serious endurance of mind. I just eat dates and raisin to curb my hunger. I just control good and well.

Then I just do nothing at all but surfing net.

Then I did some light weigh-training at home with my dumbells ( which I am not suppose to do ). Well, i alter a little bit with my process. Yeah, I have chicken and rice with my vegetable broth.

Then later I go for a slow jog before I hit the sack. The weather is too sunny for me to go for a swim.


One more day plus two more.

First day of detox

I wake up at 10am. I'm still unsure whether I shall carry on with detox program since I cheat myself by eating fried mee. Anyway, I just continue and see how it goes.

No strawberry. No papaya.

Hence I just blend pineapple, green apple and tomato to make a morning drink. Before that, I took a warm drink with slice of lemon. It is a great way to begin the cleansing and purification process.

Then I start burshing my whole body with loofah brush. YEs, every reinvigorating circular motion of my brush gives my body and spirit a chance to let go of the memory of the toxic and negative things I have been holding on to.

As old cells comes off my skin, let the old memories start to come off with them.

Then I dress up and go to Jurong point to buy grocery for my next three day plan. I buy mostly vegetables at NTUC with total cost of $20 only. Then I reach home at 1.30pm and then do my lunch drink : celery, apple, carrot and cabbage.

I do mistake, that make me puke, nearly. I shall not blend the contents but to juice them. My mum is not that supportive of my doings. I just don't bother much.

Day to get rid all ( at least most of ) negative things I want to remove from my life.

I do some yoga by myself because I am too lazy to travel to town to attend hatha yoga by mazie. After that I start to do my vegetable broth for my evening meal.

Warm vegetable broth
1/2 medium-sized of cabbage
2 medium potatoes
1 large onions
i handful parsley
4 clove of garlic
4 large carrot
2 stalks celery
handful of spinach
3 tomatoes
brocolli

Put all in giant stockpot. Next, pour in frsh wter - till the water-line rises half above all of the vegetables.Keep it low boil for 25 minutes. Turn off the ehat and let it sit for another 20 minutes. Strain the broth and discard all of the vegetable remains,, thanking thm for their contribution of vitamins, minerals and exceptional flavour. My mum see those remains with heart pain because to her, it is just a waste. I just cannot stand her nagging and not being supportive.

I don't have tortoise to give the remains as food. She does not understand that those are just rubbish, not vegetables anymore.

As usual, i still need to do my routine work but now I substitute coffee with chamomile tea with honey to calm me down.

I do not have candles for for evening comforts.

After dinner, I just walk around the neighbourhood for an hour with my favourite music. Trying to enjoy the fresh air, the laughter of the children and the smiles of the strangers.

After that, I do my littel transformation in the bathroom. Learn to appreciate myself. tell myself that I am gorgeous, spetacular, fabulous and fantastic.

Sweet dreams and goodnight, sunshine

monday

NTU first entrance

The weather is very good. Yet, I still tossing and turning in the bed, realising I may be late for meeting with Kailing later at NTU. At 11.45am, I rush for my shower, dress up in black with Utt's hairstyle. *pukes*

I buy the AA batteries first before taking a bus 243, then change to 179 bus. Luckily, it is not that crowded. Kailing calls me about my whereabout. Then I reach NTU and for first time, and I am amazed with the change in canteen A. It looks like a foodcourt, minus aircondining system.

I go to Library 1 , with intention to use the computer and print some materials. What one can expect for first day of semester - overcrowding of library. Then I just loiter around while waiting for kailing's reply. There are some events near LT 2 so i just check it out when she replys my sms. She is near LT 5.

I do not know that ECA recruitment fair starts on the first day.

Then Kailing and I decide to plan the route for photo-taking session. It takes whole afternoon to comd the whole NTU area.

Under scorching hot sun and beads of perspiration, we rest at TV lounge at hall 14. We just chat and chat and chat until we forget the time. Imagine we have so much things to talk about. I feel that it is so surreal.

Last stop will be at library 1. After having fun inside the library, we end the day at 5.30pm where most students are heading home. I am kinda of missing NTU and that's bad , very bad feeling.

Then I have late lunch at Nanyang Central while waiting for the auntie to finish photocopying my books.

I just hit the sack after that. Is this the sign of ageing? I feel so fatigued.

But I manage to watch the American Top Model 4. Only one girl catch my attention: Naima. I think she is hota nd I just love punk and she is punk girl.

I love mohawk hairstyle

She is so sweet

Anyway, she IS the next top American Model 4. Evil laugh.

home alone

Today I spend my day alone and quiet. It is a nice weather to just chill out at home with my favourite jazz compilation.

I just finish downloading Simple Life 3.

With my favourite milo, I start enjoying the reality show. The success of the Simple Life 3 depends on Charisma of Paris Hilton and bitchy personality of Nicol Richie. Frankly, i think the show will be very dead or boring without Nicole.

I love Nicole Richie. By the way, she is so skinny in the show. I even heard that, Paris does not want Nicole to be in next sequel because Paris cannot stand her companion to be skinnier than her. laughs

She loves big shades

I love big shades too.

She is bony richie

Tired

I go for my usual ABT session with Lily. The place is quite crowded as usual. I just love the pain after the class.

Lily give me a gift which I find so beautiful. It is gift of graduation. She is so sweet. I think I can wear it when I go to beach. It's so complimentary. I do not go to Body combat because I suppose to meet my friend later at 7pm.

Apparently, I do not receive any reply, hence I assume that the meeting is cancelled. My peeve is that when people is really dun want to reply their sms/message of sort ever with sense of urgency. I don't like to waste time loiteringa round in the town.

Time is very precious for me now.

Friday

Another boring day.

I need to prepare another good resume to be emailed to Halizah, hopeful that she can help me get any job at the moment.I don't expect higher , will be ended up disappointed.

"When one door of opportunity closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us. Anyway, A job search is a process, not an event in life. I may plan to pursue it over a significant span of time, not just a week or a month.

Just keep the process open-minded. Just be patient.

I know I have to anticipate an emotional roller-coaster ride as I move through the process of search. Things to be expected can be tantalized by leads and prospect but also deflated by setbacks and disappointments.

I must understand I will expect uncomfortably long dry spells, when nothing seems to be moving forward except impatience.

Job search asides, I don't believe that hacking of xiaxue's blog becomes the article for Straits Times.It is like we are losing one of the assets of Singapore. Anyway everyone love reading trashes.

I suppose to go to swim but today is cloudy weather and suppose to go gym but I miss the yoga session. Hence, I go and meet Voon at Buona Vista for awhile before deciding to go to my favourite Cafe, Essential Brew. It is very crowded there so we have to sit on first storey. I order camomile tea while he orders sunset freeze ( I think so) and two appertizers: coselaw and baguette ( I think so too ) . We chat for awhile .

I even bump Felicia and her friend. I did not know her friend still recognizes me but I don't. She looks very chiselled now, compared to that time we went for the wakeboarding course together. Nice to meet felicia again. I do not manage to catch up with her longer. Briefly I know that she is teaching now.

I hope I can get into NIE and be teacher.

After that, I go back home and have dinner. I suppose to meet Sam in town but my mum wants me to accompany her to my auntie's house to take some goodies.

Obligation,

Anyway, It is kinda of too late to meet him in town. Nowadays I am so lazy to go town unless to gym. I spend too much on transportation. Stay at home and read the books I borrow at jurong point community centre just now. Books on yoga and detox again.

another day

I wake up quite early everyday but then My body is just too heavy to rise. Hence I end up waking up late again. Then I have lunch I bought downstair and then go to Jurong Point library to return the book and borrow Men's Exercise magazines.

I take a train to Killiney Road just to pay my phone bills.Suddenly i just don't feel like going to gym again. I just loiter around for a while and then walk to YMCA. I realise that Mcdonalds restaurant is closed down for renovation.

I walk to Funan Centre and have my dinner at Foodcourt. Then I take a bus to clementi because I need to buy some stationery and files at Big Bookshop.

Anyway, I have passion for cooking. I definitely buy a cookbook there because it is cheap. This time, I really shop ( with impulse ) at bookshop.

Then I take a bus 99 when Samuel calls me to meet up. So I stop at Jurong East and meet him at JE MRT station. I decide to go IMM for dinner. We had dinner at KFC/Pizza Hut/Taco Bell restaurant. Coincidently, we have a healthy taco bell meal. We chit chat a while again before going to Kopi Tiam to have our ever favourite breakfast set: coffee , kaya toast and two half-boiled eggs, However, the stall close early so I tell him that I need to buy the cheap chicken at Giant mart again. This time I buy two whole chickens.They cost only $9.

Sam and I act like two himbos as usual. We go and try out bits of the candies and preserved items there. We go and eat like nobody business. But of course, we do buy their stuff. I buy preserved ginger for my mum and Sam buys sour plum for his brother. Apparently, the aunties look at us with dismay.

That's thrilling.

Then we go to Burger King for awhile and enjoy the green teas.

Sam ask for my opinion on relationships and love. I just go dumb. I can advise anyone on any topic except these two.

No experience.

Then I take bus home while he takes taxi home.

Hacked

Xiaxue's blog had been hacked/cracked and that is serious.

I love reading the comments by xiaxue's fans as well as anti-Xiaxue camp. It is very entertaining and hilarious. This is somehow a lesson for her and maybe us.

What goes around, comes around. It is proven. No point being arrogant after the fall. It does not pay to be famous.

It hurts.

As the rest of us, It will be better to save the archives in case. Life is such journey, full of unpredictable events.

We are so vulnerable to all kinds of attacks in virtual world as well as in real world.

I remembered I was hacked by 16 year olds guy from Penang. Imagine he chatted with me through ICQ and said that he can manipulate my computer. Surpisingly, my CD rom tray open and the close automatically after he said that he was going to do that. I got a rude shock. I started to get panicked. He said he wanted to be a friend of mine.

Who wants to befriend a hacker, for goodness sake. I do not even forgive people who intrude my privacy , let alone those who manipulate my personal computer. So many important datas and files are kept inside.

gasp.

I ask my friend, Terence for help. I realise there was the presence of Trojan file in one of the folders. Hence, I just reformat my computer. I hate doing such things. Time consuming.

I can imagine how Wendy felt when suddenly a stranger just robbed your life without realising.

Luckily I am using Mac now.

peeling

I attend Hatha Fusion Yoga at 5.30pm by Mazie. Thsi time involves balancing . Despite trying hard to strike the yoga pose gracefully, I feel rejunevated and feel that my lower back and back and abdominal getting stronger. I quickly rush home to avoid human congestion

I take a train to meet Sam at Jurong Entertainment Centre for a while. I just accompany him for dinner at KFC restaurant.He suggests to go Holland Village because there is nothing interesting at IMM.

I beg to differ because I have no mood to travel far plus it is very expensive to chill out at Holland Village at this hour. It takes on hour of silence and it is very awkward one before making decision.

I tell him that I will go Holland Village with him on one condition that I wont go to Holland Village again this weekend. I try to compromise but he knows that this will cause friction to our friendship, hence offers to treat me drink there. I insist that won't be neccesary because I don't think I go Holland Village with such intention.

Anyway, we take train there because I reject the idea of taking cab there. I don't want himn to waste money. Then we chill out at Essential Brew cafe for a while. So many gorgeous people there. We just talk about music again and listen to his collection again.

I guess he must be bored because his PC is not working. I can understand that our life revolve with internet. We just cannot survive without internet. It becomes an integral of our life.

Then I go back home by bus. It is a long journey home.

I realise that I am getting fairer because of the peeling process. It gives a toll on my complexion. I manage to see visible ugly red patches and that is terrible. I really wonder why I need to look good for other. It ruins me one day.

Skin Peeling is bad

surf online

Dear user,

We are pleased to confirm your subscription of Wireless Broadband services for 9xxxxxxx with immediate effect.

Best Regards,
StarHub

It means I enjoy unlimited access and surf online outside. How thrilling.

Unlimited* access at one flat fee at only $10.50 (w/GST) a month, experience unlimited surfing outside of your home and office, and at speeds that you have come to enjoy. No more worrying about volume of time based usage and other complicated plans!.

I am going try this weekend, perhaps at Coffee Beans cafe at Holland Village.


Suddenly my mum call my name with urgency and asks me to look outside the window and see below. I see the cat , similar to our own cat, lying motionless. I am like "roll eyes" at my mum and tells me such lame news. She even calls my sister about it. I know she missses our cat.

I realise how fragile life is. I fear death because I am not well-prepared to meet the One. Worse, my religious uncle told my my mum that her illness due to her faults. Well, my mum is very confused pertaining this matter because she has never bore any grudge or hatred to anyone. She mentions about the upbringing of me and my sister. My sister is already blissfully married and I am such a slacker.

I afraid her illness gets to do with me and my sins. I know it is a little supersitious [ well, I am superstitious thanks to my mum ] but there is spiritual bond between my mum and I. We bear similar name somehow.

I remember once, she got scolded by my grandparents and father for causing near-death experience I had. I was very naughty until she cannot take it anymore, hence she just just cursed me and at that time also, I started to vomit non-stop, even cough blood. This incident horrified her and even my father and grandparents.

Maybe being a mother, one has to be very patient. But after all, mother is still a human, and everyone has his/her bad days.

From that moment, both my parents don't even beat me up like they used to. They are smart enough to use mind games with us. I also remember that everytime my father bought the cane, either my sis or I would just throw the cane out of the windows. Until they give up hope to buy again and again.

Love move the mountain, I guess.

The cat we like is DEAD

Simple Life

Estranged socialites Paris Hilton and Nicole Richie may be contractually forced into a fourth season of their Fox TV show, "The Simple Life."

Back in April, the 24-year-old Hilton hinted her new bestie, Rod Stewart's model daughter Kimberly, would be taking over Richie's role on the hit reality series.

But it seems Hilton and Richie may be forced into a public reunion, with the US Fox network reportedly calling on the duo's contractual obligations for a fourth season.

Possible storylines for the upcoming series include following the it-girls during preparations for their weddings - or filming their reconciliation.

But Hilton's rep would not confirm the reports, saying to People: "No decisions have been made regarding The Simple Life 4."

The party princess was much more frank about their relationship a few months ago.

"It's no big secret that Nicole and I are no longer friends. Nicole knows what she did, and that's all I'm ever going to say about it," she said.

I just love blondes

"Exact sentiments"

I open my starhub letter and pleasantly find out that this month's bill is only $56.30 compared to previous months like $118 in April, $92 in May and $86 in June. Well, It have to do with a minimal or no more gossiping with somebody. I should call it blessing in disguise because I can save money on my bills.

"That's hot"

Today, I stay at home on Sunday. Maybe I just feel not well today as well as lazy to go out on Sun.

I read on the newspaper that there was some kind of blogger.sg gathering at DXO. I do not know that blogging can be so happening. And there was even conference being held with media presents. So big deal. I remembered once, asking Juliana to open up an online journal because she found my blog aspiring and express interests to open up. Blogging is just another unique form of expression.The only side effect that one does not know who wil be reading your blog.

Definitely, my blog is not an arena or forum for discussion for an anonymous audiences. No silly propaganda or excessive controversial bitchings in my blog. Hopefully, whatever postings do serve kind of purpose and instill positivity in any readers.

Controversy? Should I?

I am not ready yet.

I just realise that my blog is getting boring. I better do something.

career choice

Nothing Much to do but to wait for Guziel to finish his meeting with his girlfriend at 3.30pm. I decide to sms him that I am going to wear like executive : Shirt and pants. But he just wears simple only.

Poser as usual.

We meet at Jurong East MRT station tentatively. On the way there, there so many primary school children aboarding the train. I guess they are going for the NDP rehearsal, seeing all of them are wearing red tee shirts. How come the school does not cater bus services as what it suppose to do, especially on saturday.

I alight at station and wait for Guziel. Imagine standing duirng the journey from Jurong East to Tanah Merah. Even people are rushing for a seat which is not meant for them [ for the old people and kids ].

Suddenly I see more primary schoold children but from different school waiting for the train in neat fashion. I guess MOE want this children to understand taking the train with friends.Just assumption.

THe career fair is somehow a flop, to my opinion. It is very small and not much people attending the fair. Nothing interests me here actually except MOE. I did see some familiar faces from california fitness center booth.

We go to the MOE booth, the biggest booth among the rest. I need to ask enquiries regarding the teaching positions and I am considering following my sister's footstep to be one. The salary is very tempting : $2568 + $300 [ if i can get tuition ] = 3K.

I can buy car and condominium.

Then we walk around and stop at SCDF booth to check out the salary. Officer's pay : $2618. We is being approached by the beautiful Mdm Ong, to explain us the working system of the Office in SCDF. I cannot imagine myself in uniform and carry big waterhoses.

So wrong.

After filling some forms, we take a train to Bugis to have dinner. I have my fried Hokkien noodle and Guziel has siew mai and wanton noodle for dinner. I still forget that I am wearing a shirt and eating noodles with gravy is a bad idea. the gravy just splash all over my shirt and Guziel's newspaper.

My latest look

Why I still have a bad table manners? Embarrasing.

Then i decide to go home while Guziel has to go back to hospital. I just dislike crowd nowadays.

I think I am going to stay late at night to watch my all time favourite movies : Aliens I and Aliens II. Then I sms someone whether he is interested in watching Fantastic 4 for $1.60 due to ST anniversary. I know I need to go early to buy the tickets at cineleisure. I wait and wait but no reply.

Then I decide to go online and see him online. I thought he may still at hospital and I can understand that no usage of handphone in hospital but to see him online,it gives me surpise. Then I message him twice at different time.

No reply.

I get peeved. This is serious matter. Even I am busy at the moment, I will try to sms or message back as a form of courtesy unless otherwise. Maybe, I expect too much [ which i don't ]. Nevertheless, I decide to call off and do my own plan.I don't even know what he is thinking and planning.I just go offline after waiting.I don't want to miss the movie

I just feel irritated.

I manage to get his sms reply at 11.17am. How sincere!

I am going to play the games by his rules.

Convocation Day

I look damn suave :)

Yeah, today marks a final journey and a new beginning in the chapters of my life. Today is my graduation ceremony and it will be held at 2pm at Nanyang Auditorium.

My mum does not inform any of my relatives about my convocation. One is enough [My sister was lucky to have people attending her convocation]. It will be me, and my parents.

I start to get prepared and at 11am, we set off to NTU by taxi, The place is quite crowded and the graduates are already in their robes except mine. I am not sure how the system works and I am quite panicky at the moment.but still, I need to keep cool.

There is no one I know.

Then I go down to Nayang Auditorium and ask around first. After that, I go and fetch my parents to go inside. I go to robing area to wear my robe but then the palce is quite crowded actually. I manage to see Mark [Hall 14] and ask him how to wear the gown. I am lucky to bump into him.

I just wear my robe outside the area so that my mum can help me pin the yellow thingy on the robe. It is damn heavy actually. How come I don't feel good or even proud wearing the robe. Plus the mortar flatten my already-flat hairstyle.

I look damn ugly with it but I cannot take it off because the hairstyle just goes wrong. While waiting, we start to take picture, of me only. I am so bored and alone.

If it was my batch [ last year], I would spend my time taking pictures while waiting to go in.

I just stand alone after my parents go in to get the good seat.

ALONE.

Last Time at Nanyang Audi

I am so pathetic. I am trying hard to enjoy the convocation moment but I can not.

I quickly go in and take my seat and impatiently wait for the ceremony to start. I manage to watch some presentation on screen to kill time. I am the few to take a seat early. I cannot even take the mortar off my head because of the worng hairstyle. I am so regret for not having a haircut.

I am getting headache due to weight of the mortar.

People start to come in and be seated. There are few familiar faces around. I just hope the camera won't capture me and the whole auditorium will see my horrified face on large screen. The seats beside me are still empty until 2pm.

Then the big shots come down and fill the place on the stage , then the deputy dean gives a short message and ceremony begins. I feel quite nervous actually. I don't know why. Maybe self-consciousness.

One by one, the names are being called out. Sooner it will be my turn. yeah, I look smart and proud but I don't feel happy inside actually. Imagine people in my batch willl be clapping hard when i am onstage. *laughs*

S**T.

Then when the last few graduate walk to receive the transcript. The claps are getting louder and louder until the last person receive it, the whole auditorium fills with cheers and loud clap, The happiness just fill the whole auditorium.

I know I am really feel proud at that moment. For my parents.

Then we are usher to School of Biological science hall for the party. I meet few people of my batch to congratulate them. I know the smile in every one of us is genuine. Then my parents feel hungry so we go and have a bite first before my sister comes down to fetch us.

We have to wait for some VIPs to come down to open the ceremony. Those parents stand by the food, waiting like hungry wolves.

3...2....1.... everyone is rushing to grab whatever on the buffet. Imagine mothers, fathers stack up their food on the small plate. roll eyes.

I go and help to take food for my parents. Then I go and take my food further from the main door where more varieties of food are available. When I return, my parents throw them away. I am shocked because I fight with other parents and graduates just to take the food and they throw away.

My mum says that the food is going to stale especially the mee siam. thanks goodness I take some pastry and sushi for them. I am not that keen to eat there because I just want to get out of the place. I don't want to meet those three bitches there.

Then my father spots his friend and we all go there and say hi. I am such a snobbish guy that time. I cannot be bothered with their sons or daughters somehow. I also realise that they know my existence.

That's hot. I don't know that I am their one of the daily topics.

It starts to rain yet my sister is not here yet.And I am getting impatient.

I decide to suggest to go home by taxi. i tell my mum to call my sister to just postpone to fetch us because I cannot wait for another hour at school. There is no taxi hence I call the taxi service to fetch at convocation. I get scolded by idiotic driver for giving wrong street. And then the usher gives sarcastic remark that I do not even know the area well, despite studying in NTU for many years, I am like *roll eyes*

Stop flirting with my mum in front of my father, you %$#^@&@. Luckily, I just smile.

The day to remember and forget easily.

Even my sister is not even present during my convocation ceremony. So pathetic.

WTF!

Then later at night, I go and meet Samuel at Coffee Beans cafe at Holland Village for a while.

Me with my neighbour's Kids

Good Bye NTU

sadness

Seeing people posting their convocation ceremnoy pictures with their friends make me feel sad and alone. I hate this feeling.

Listening to 95 FM on radion at 4am does not help me alleviate my loneliness. I want my convocation to be grand one.

No one is attending mine.

shopping

I wake up late again. But I manage to go gym for a while around 3pm before shopping time.

I go to Taka S.C. to shop for shoes and a shirt. The price there is quite steep actually, then I have lunch at Lucky Plaza. I order my usual meal: Chicken Curry Rice. Then I continue my hunt at Tangs dynasty but still cannot find what i want.

Then go to Paragon Metro and Spencer stores, leaving the place in vain. Then i decide to buy my shirts at John Little because I remember browsing the shirts with lily and they are cheap.

Suddenly, I see urban Sale at OG orchard, hence decide to drop by. I guess I manage to what I want here

Black shoes: $49
Shirts [pink and white]: $19.90 and $18
Ties [ grey and blue] : $10
Giordano tees [ pink and yellow]: $13

What a bargain!

Then i decide to go Bugis and just do window-shopping to kill time so I can meet Sam later perhaps. I manage to buy two bags cost me $37. I find out the guys in california gym do carry this kind of bag to work n gym

Damn I really need cam phone to make my blog more picturesque.

I get bored already so i decide to go back to orchard Road with so many things to carry. I hang out at HMV till 7pm when I decide to sms Sam again.

No reply.

I decide to go home when he calls me that he is with his client and will meet up some other day.

I realise that going to Orchard Road and just walking around is really waste of time. I have so many things to do at home.

Just I reach home, I straight away go to bed. My leg is very aching now.

black magic

Today I have to accompany my mum at home since the contractor for forfeiting of windows panels will be coming later but when I woke up and is told by mym that the contractor is still not her and ask me to call them.

I'm just woke up. I hate this kind of obligation. Anyway I still have to do the task right.

Apparently I spend my whole day at home again since the contractor comes and check the windows panel and the actual fitting will be after 4pm. There goes my scheduled training at cali gym.

Then my mum suddenly feel sick when she taste the tapioca leaves brought from Indonesia. Her tongue starts to get itchy and eventually cause chest pain. She has difficulty to eat and drink water. I am not that worried until in evening when she looks half- dead.

I am really do not what to do.

Then she wants me to accompany her to grandpa's house at Boon Lay for traditional medicinal assistance. I will not say that my grandpa is witchdoctor or some magical healer [ bomoh ]. My grandpa is very religious and pious man.

Reluctantly again, I follow her again , seeing her in such painful state. Once we reach there, we are welcomed by the visitors who sought help from my grandpa. My grandma is also not in the good health state. Suddenly this visitor keeps stealing glance until he asks my mum that I am his son.

I am like DUH!

I had grown up and even taller than him. I just give a diplomatic smile to him. He asks me to join the conversation with them. I tell him that I do not know how to involve chit-chat session with old people.

After they leave, my auntie and family come too. There is so much things to say and I love listening to them and act gorgeous. I just loves it.

My uncle says that we should not just take any wild tapioca plants anyhow and even takes the plants without proper permission from rightful owner. As usual, mum is defensive regarding this. What interests me is black magic cast on my mum when she was young.

I do not know that someone casted a spell on my mum that whenever she saw my father, she just hate and despice him. I am quite surpised to know from my mum, she really hate my father and she is with me and my sister.

According to auntie, my mum was lucky to be married with very patient man like my father or else they would be ended up divorce because no guy could not tolerate my mum's hideoous behavior that time.

I only remember the black cat incident when I was very young. I hate black cats since then. This cat kept scratching the door with that kind of screeching sound but the most spooky part this cat call my mum's name. I am not bragging that my mum is such a kind and good soul. Some people just simply jealous of and even hate her because she is just a perfect housewife, mother, friend, daughter, wife and any role she plays. This cause higher expectation from my mum to my sister to be like her, to be a good daughter.

So outdated.

Now, when my mum has this excessive burping or belching, my auntie makes an assumption that she is under bad magic spell again since my mum has been going to sort of clinics, hospitals and even traditonal cure, they find nothing wrong.

How can everyone in my family is so backwards? I just roll eyes.All those teachings and religions, i wonder.

Anyway, listening and learning from their conversation enrich my knowledge somehow.

Around 10pm, we go back home.

Home

I stay at home again. Nothing much to do but read some books and articles on careers.

Let's assume you have determined that it takes, on average, five interviews to get one job offer.If goal is three job offers, that means you need to create about 15 interviews. Hence, my goals is 15 interviews, that means I need to send out about 150 CVs during my employment campaign.

That is a lot.

Job hunting is just like a sales operation - I am selling myself. Like any good salesperson, I need to know where I'm going and what it takes to get there. If i don't know, the temptation is simply to work hard, not really knowing how far along I truly on the path to that new position. Lacking a clear direction builds in stress and fatigue, and foster discouragement.

Hence I need to send out two targeted CVs. Does that get the new job for me? Probably not. So a week later, I have to send out ten CVs, received three rejection letters. and no interviews. Will I be discouraged?No, I am on target.

I am developing quantity to get to the quality. I just need to understand my numbers. Get it?

So how do you get a job in half the time? Double the daily output of targeted CVs sent from two per day to four per day. You will expose yourself in the quantity necessary in half the time and increase the probablity of getting the required quantuty of interviews and resulting job offers in significantly less time.

I need to find job: So that I can change my blog title from Life of being slacker to life of being socialite.

Later at late night with my mum, Bunawar smses me that his mother is at ICU@NUH and he feels sad and feel pain seeing his beloved mum. When i tell my mum and look at her, it makes me love my mum more. My mum also worries about all this medical check-up beause she is not in the good health. She has this excessive burping problems and she feels paranoid.

Nothing can be done but just a little prayer for the best of health to his mum.

Who has the most right to our hearts, to our love and respect? Who deserves most, to hear our words of kindness, and appreciation? Our parents, of course!  A mother's love for her child is a prayer, an invocation for the wellbeing of her child.  It is through her love that her child learns to crawl, to walk, to speak, to relate to others in the community. Surely we can offer our mothers and our fathers, companionship, words of comfort and appreciation!

When we were ill, she suffered with us, fearful that some misfortune might befall us. In her worry and anxiety she would cry and beseech God to restore us to good health and grant us a long and prosperous life. In the same way, too, a good deed from us, brings joy to her heart, but when we do something wrong, it fills her heart with disappointment and tears stream down her cheeks. Love deserves love!

Hence, being a son in the family, present her with your recitation of good surah and a prayer. May God bless you and your family. God willing.

Just remember. The way we treat others, so shall we be treated. We can see this by looking around and reflecting on the successes and failures of others. Clearly, those who sow good seeds reap goodness; and those who sow evil only reap sorrow.  The reward for good deeds can only be good, and the reward for bad deeds can only bring us closer to self-destruction.

Life of Life

I am alone at home again. My parents will be back very late today.it means I have freedom to walk around naked, watch TV naked and surf internet naked. Love being bare and basic. However I put on my briefs when i eat . I think it is rude to eat naked. [laugh]

I spend whole day at home. I bought my breakfast , cook my lunch myself. I spend some quality time reading some motivational books I borrowed from library. Yes, i read in nude. Time to ponder and change my life,

Life is a series of choices. We all have choices about how we will act or not act,and those choices can have repercussions later on in life.

I have a low self-esteem for many years. We think we get upset because of the bad things happened to us. For example, being treated badly by a loved one or betrayed by a friend of colleague. It's certain normal to feel intense hurt and anger when someone you trusted has taken advantage of you.It can be sometimes be quite difficult to develop feelings of optimism and self-respect again.

Of course, I get depressed for yet another reason. I feel defective and inferior and believe that there is something deeply wrong with me. I told myself I was not confident, charming, pretty, or even smart enough to feel happy and worthwhile. I compared myself to others who appear to be more confident and successful.

"I'm not like that."

There are people who get depressed because of difficulties in their career or personal relationship. Many of us base our self-esteem on being successful at work, at school and relationships with other.

For two years, my mind is being programmed by a toxic friend[ during secondary days]who claimed to be a very good friend to psychologically abuse me to worthlessness of self. He was a good actor and know when and how to manipulate my weakness to help. He pay evilness for my kindness.

I was made a victim of circumstances.

Epictetus said," Men are not disturbed by things, but by the views they take of them."

the bad things that happend do not really cause us to become upset. We get upset because of the way we think about these events.

Only one person in this world can ever make me feel depressed,worried or angry - and that person is me.

Well, negative thoughts are natural. Nearly all of us think this way from time. I could change for better. Thank goodness.

I just love reading such motivational books.

I feel hungry so I go to pioneer mall to buy my dinner. When I walk towards the foodcourt, I bump into this toxic friend who does not realise he is front of me. I just avoid him to do my stuff. When I look at him and look at myself, I am lucky that I changed better in terms of physical and character. At least his consolation is that with his looks, he can manage to attract old aunties.

[laughs]

I do some grocery shopping at Giants supermart and the walk home. It is kind of lobe distance especially when I am carrying these stuffs. I watch the NKF show while enjoying my Nasi Bryani.

I hate it when my dinner is being disturbed by the call. My mum calls and ask me to buy dinner for both of them. Reluctantly, I leave my dinner halfway and go down to buy the dinner.

A virtuous child will fulfill his obligations towards his parents.When we realized how much our parents have done for us, every son/ daughter must love and respect his/her parents, must be good towards them and must be grateful to them.A child who does this will be bounteously rewarded with paradise in the hereafter and will enjoy a life of happiness and comfort in this world.

No complaints.

Luckily, I do not miss the beautiful performance by Fann Wong as a beautiful peacock. I have never like Fann wong, but as her performance is simply blown-away [ not the acrobatic stunt with the tea candles] . What amazes me more is the segment by the five hunks [ Ix, Christopher, Geping, Jeff and Adam] I do not know Geping has nice bod. Truly, hard work in short time to get buff bods is really inspiring. I am too slow

shopping with lily

Today my parents go to Indonesia again and I am stopped by my mum not to go there because she does not want me to get dark [tanned] so i can look good on friday. Imagine my mum is much more concerned about how I look. It is funny that I am as much vain as my mum. My sister and father are much moderate in taking care of the looks. Scary.

I meet lily at Wisma S.C at 3pm. I am late for half hour. She purchased this beautiful bracelet with a little cat shape. Then we go to Zara to look for the clothes and shoes. Nothing is pleasant at all now. Then we walk to John little at Specialist Centre.

Lily needs to buy some baby gift for her colleague and there is sale. I can anticipate that pyjama motif will be in fashion soon.[ maybe the reader don't understand what i mean ] . I just need to dinish downloading the adobe photoshop so I can start uploading my picture. I do not manage to get my stuff but I am ok with it.

Pyjamas motif is going to be hit

We have lunch at Cuppage center. We have thai food at Lerk thai. We are not that impressed with the food plus it is so expensive for such small quantity being served.

Then we go to cali gym for usual ABT class by James S. Today so many beautiful ladies attend the class. I think I need to get rid of some dirty thoughts when attending such class. Never ever wear shorts for ABT class. The positions can be very tiltilating. Today James do butt excercise. I really feel the pain and ache on my lower body like abds, butt and thigh [ that is why they call ABT]

Then we stay behind to attend Collin' bodycombat. Today he play old tracks and moves.

After that, we go back home. I am home alone and bored somehow. Nothing to do tonite and keep changing channels on TV. I realise that there ain't good show on Saturday. I will go crazy. Then I go online and see Derek online. I suggest we go clubbing and he keen at last.

Been a long time to club and sweat off again despite having a butt ache. I just feel so beautiful tonite. La la la.

Loser

Surpise! Surpise!

A old 'friend' from my secondary school manages to get hold of my friendster and send hurt message as per normal to me. I really wonder what he still has not let go of his unhappiness and envy towards me. He still stuck in some outdated mode of being and afraid to let go because he is still investing in that OLD image of himself.

Just forgive yourself and move on. I had already put him behind me and move on. It is not easy to forgive a fool who keeps trying to bring me down because of his insecurity or even low self-esteem. But for the sake of his own growth to be better person, learn to be a good person.

I already forgived him [ my enemy],nothing annoys them so much, perhaps.

But Forgiving does not equal letting someone off the hook.Or forgiveness doesn't mean that I have to condone what someone has done to me or ever having to tolerate someone's wrongful behavior.

I forgive people, not for their sake, but for mine.I forgive because I want to set myself free.Yeah, free by breaking the feeling of anger, hurt, helplessness or shame. Still, he is clouded by hated and jealousy. Total outdated.

I already mention about the saying, " What goes around comes around" . I just laugh at his silliness and delete.

I go and meet Guziel at Taka S.C library and then try to figure out where to have a dinner. We go to the Food fair at the basement level to look for some finger food. Then we take a bus to City Hall but we both are happily chat until we miss the bus-stop and end up at Suntec bus-stop. We walk to Esplanade to show Guziel the SRC which is near Embassy,

Then we walk to Lau Pa Sat to have dinner. The food is apparently expensive and in small quantity. Then we do not have any plan to go hence we take a train to city hall again and hang out at HMV for a while before going home.

Check out my new hairstyle

wake up

I woke up early somehow. I go and eat Mee Siam I bought yesterday and mine! it is horrible. I just get ready and go to gym at Orchard to attend Body pump by Toni since I miss bodycombat by Christina.

As usual, I always feel ugly when I come to california. Today almost the ladies attend the class are middle-aged women of different race and only 5 studs of nice bod and good look. Suddenly I feel so demoralized.

Toni's class is hell. She likes to do legs set during bodypump. My legs are like so small and weak. I guess I skip doing the Yoga by mazie. Anyway, Those studs are afterall not studs. They seems struggling during the class.

Word of advice: Don't show off by carrying heavy weights because bodypump is about buidling endurance not strength. Seeing their face cram and cringe while doing the sets, just loves it.

Then I go to showe cubicle, apply coconut oil on my hair and lather it. As you know, coconut oil is infamous for its smell despite having a good use. I hope the sauna room is empty. I want the heat to eveaporate the oil, causing my hair smooth and slinky. [vain] Then I go to steam room for final treatment. Thanks goodness, the vapours trap the coconut oil smell. There are people there.

After that, I go and have shower, shampoo and condition my hair. It feels great to have soft hair and morever I have quite long hair .

Then I go to Ang Mo Kio to have chicken rice as a lunch before going to AMK library to borrow some books. I decide to take a nap on the sofa for a while because those uncles and kids in front me tempt me to doze off. I get awaken by the phone ring.

Then getting my books, I walk to Yio Chu Kang pool for a swim. I need to shred some love handles by the end of the month. It is such a painful procedure to look good. I afraid I just lose the determination along the way.

Time to go home and take a nap.

When I am about to sleep at 1am, I just toss and turn on my bed, My mind is full of thoughs and memories. The momeries of days in NTU - from year 1 to year 4. I afraid I may miss the school days. I need to go to school and take pictures of the school. I hope Kailing may be free to accompany me.

creativity

I am going to Ang Mo Kio library to do my master dream list. Then Guziel calls me to ask what i am going to do later. I tell him my plan. He laughs at my intention to go library to do unneccesary thing where I should go and find job.

Well, I beg to differ actually. I just trying to maximise the potential of my brain actually. I do not want people to call me dumb black hair dude for ever. I have been spending my four years using left side of my brain, it is time to balance my thinking and use the right side of brain.

The right tasks included rhythm, spatial awareness, Gestalt (whole picture), imagination, daydreaming, color, and dimension. The left included words, logic, numbers, sequence, linearity, analysis, and lists.

Good news: When people who were weak in one area were trained in that given area, and what's more, simultaneously strengthened their performance in other areas.

For example, if someone who had been weak in drawing skills was trained to draw and paint, their academic performance increased overall especially in subjects such as geometry where perception and imagination are so important.

Another example is the right-brain skill of daydreaming, which is essential to your brain's survival. Daydreaming gives needed rest to those parts of the brain which have been doing more analytical and repetitious work, exercises your protective and imaginative thinking, and gives you a necessary chance to integrate and create. Most of the great geniuses used directed daydreaming to help them solve problems, generate ideas and achieve their great goals.

I am just trying to sharpen my brain to certain depth. Brain is the only God-given gift and we should make full use of it to have better life. Anyway, nothing wrong to dream.

People need a purpose for their lives. As human beings, we function better when we have goals- and a reason for being on this earth that goes beyond keeping ourselves alive- and beyond making money and acquiring the things (i.e. cars, houses, stocks) that our society uses to measure us.

And I am blessed that I am not born with disabilities. These people [ with disabilities ] dreams big despite society's negative attitudes.

Enough said,

Guziel decides to meet me at Yio Chu Kang stadium for a jog. We have pause for awhile because there is Rugby competition carrying on. We just enjoy and watch the competition. I am impressed by the hard training they have to undergo before competition. No wonder, they have such a big, and nice bods. Maybe I should dream to be a rugby player.

*smile*

After that, Guziel goes to town to attend pilates at his gym while I ahve my swimming routine because i do not feel like going to cali gym for any class or training. I hate the crowds there.

Then go home

ibook

I go to Funan Centre to take my ibook back. Surpisingly it cost $260 instead of $269. Mistake? I cannnot be bothered actually because I am rushing to meet Guziel at Raffles City. On the way there, I meet Kevin, the sub-owner of NUM shop.

We both go to G2000 shop because I need a black pants for my convocation ceremony. I cannot expect to wear my ah-beng black pants there, It looks weird. And it cost only $30 after discount. So thrilling.

There are so many policemen around the Raffles City. It may be the OIC members staying in Westin Stamford. The security is very tight. In every 5 steps, we sure bump into policemen in pair patrolling. I think this is too exagerrating. I feel like I am at Police Academy. We have healthy lunch at subway cafe.

Then we go to Raffles Place as Guziel wants to know the location of Market street, then we go back home by train. I do noot feel like going for a run with my ibook. I afraid it may get lost if I leave it unattended.

I spend my whole nighth, downloading the software and starting trying out my ibook again. I feel good to have ibook back.

Welcome back, virtual.

Busy day

Lily's birthday is coming soon.It means I need to look good. It can very taxing when ugly people like need to beautify for such occasion. Without having concession stamp, I can feel the pinch about the money spent on transportation. So I decide to go to Jurong East Library with Guziel to borrow some books.

I come to library early, find a good spot and enjoy the silence while reading the book. I feel so young. Then he joins me at 5pm. Almost one hour late. After getting the books we want, we have our dinner at Long John Silver Restaurant.

Long John Silver Restaurant serves the cheapest combo meals among the others. It costs $4.35 for a two fish fillet, fries, salad and a drink. The salad is appertizing actually , instead of coleslaw. I just love it.

I miss the days when i always hang out at Jurong East Complex during my secondary school days. We chat awhile before going back home. These few days, I alway go back home early and that pleases my mum so much.

She has the chance to kiss me before going to sleep every night.

shopping alone

Today everyone is busy, and that makes me alone on sunday.

I was really out of mind , wearing tight bright tee with Donald Duck design to Orchard. It is really social suicide.

Actually, I am going to buy the black shoes at Zara but once I reach there, the shoes are gone. It is really a wasted trip. I really love that shoes. Then I go to Zara at takashimaya S.C but no sight of those shoes. I feel so disappointed. Waiting for Guziel's sms reply does not help me calm down.

He is shopping with his friend. I wonder he takes so long to reply my sms as there is nothing to be secretive right, At least and at last he calls me. I just go home, alone.

I reach home for awhile, trying to relax when Sam calls me whether I want to meet up because he is so bored now . He just had heartburn just now hence he needs to go home to rest. No wonder he does not want to meet me just now. I am not sure whether want to meet him because it is 8.30pm.

He says he is willing to pay for my cabfare which I am reluctant to agree to his terms. I just take a train to Buona Vista and walk to Holland Village. Surpisingly, I reach there quite fast. I meet him at Starbucks cafe and just chill out actually. I enjoy my favourite blended green tea. Then starbucks close early, hence we walk around and decide to chill out at TCC cafe.

So many young lesbians.

I order my usual drink, Sea of Passion . Luckily Sam treats me Brownies because I have not had my dinner yet . I am about to eat my dinner I bought from Pasar Malam at Boon Lay Bus interchange when he calls me.

At 11.45pm, we decide to go home by cab.

gym fun

Today I do not know why I must attend gym session in afternoon because I do not want to meet the crowd there. However when I am about to attend bodybalance, I bump into lily who was just finish her Hip hop class. It is a pleasant surpise somehow.

She asks me to join her to ABT class while I am deciding to attend Bodybalance by Collin. And it is tempting because I am wanting to try ABT class but does not pursue because mostly the attendees are women. I decide to join lily then. She introduces her beautiful friends, Yvonne and one more. i forget her name. They just love hip hop class they attend previously. They decide to do ABT together. I feel good to be together with three of them.

ABT class is really hell. It is really a torturous process but I feel good after that. At least I can really feel the pain from muscle contradiction from my thighs and abdominal. I am seriously embarassedas I cannot do the standard sit-up. I should attend more of this class. I just loves my legs. Unlike those with big top [ big chest and back ] but chickened legs.

I am so proportional.

Despite wobbly legs, I decide to attend bodycombat class by my favourite instructor Collin. This time, so many guys are attending his class. I just hate it.

After that, I go home because my whole leg are aching. Sam calls me to join him for chill out but I am just so tired to go out again.

Busy Night

I meet Guziel at Clementi MRT at 12pm , then go for a prayer and after that, chill out at Cineleisure foodcourt for awhile. We just have fruits for lunch. Then we go to our respective gym for a workout before meeting again later. I finish early hence I go to Paragon and meet him outside Fitness First gym.

We walk around for a while before to have a early dinner at $2 foodcourt at Lucky plaza. I have my usual curry chicken rice while Guziel has his Nasi Lemak. We chat for awhile before going to Takashimaya S.C.

There is sales at my favourite boutique. How thrilling. 30% off.

I just love the shoes and the shirts but too bad, I just try out the clothes and not buying it.

Then we go to Isetan Scotts S.C so Guziel wants to have his watch strap shortened there. Then we shop at Topman for awhile before colleting the watch. Then we do not sure what to do next. I decide to call David and coincidently, he is at Paragon to watch Female anniversay thingy. We walk there and meet him. Seems everyone does not know waht to do so we decide to go home early.

I take train home with David because I do not have anymore concession stamps. I feel like an adult.

That's not hot.