Merdeka, Malaysia

Today I decide to follow my parents to Johore Bahru. We are celebrating Malaysia Independence day today.Laugh out loud.

My father who takes off day today suggests to take new bus service at Tuas Interchange at secondlink.After my mum is back from work, we start to get ready and take a cab to Tuas Bus interchange.

We realise that there is not bus service to Johore Bahru via secondlink but there is one at Jurong East bus interchange. My father gets wrong information.

Bad thing is my mum is going to nag about this and I do not like this kind of mentality not to accept the mistake and learn but instead attacking the mistake made more deep. I really do not like my mum's attitude sometimes.

Luckily the atxi driver takes a pee at the toilet. We take the same cab and drive to Kranji MRT station. From there, we take a smiley yellow bus to Johore Bahru via first link.

Then we decide to go Kotaraya for shopping but end up to Larkin interchange. I always think that Larkin is Kotaraya. My mum is quite pissed to know that we are not going to kotaraya since we are at larkin.

There are so many Malaysian and Johore Bahru state flags.

We decide to have lunch at hawker stall at thirsd story of the Larkin plaza. It is kind of weird to see those crowd especially when I am wearing bermuda. Eyes just fix on my inappropriate dressing. I love the food here.

Merdeka Flags, Yong Tau Foo and Batick shirt I am wearing

My parents order the safest kind o food here: Fried chicken rice. Everytime, we go Johore, they definitely order fried chicken rice. But for me, I prefer variety. I order Yong tau foo. At first, I am quite skeptical choosing the condiments on display. They do not look appertizing especially the vegetables.

Heck care.

I assume that I have a good stomach and order a lot of green and other else. It cost me RM7.It is quite nice , surpisingly. So do the fried chicken rice. The owner comes and talks to us for a while. She tells us that there are so many Indonesian workers today. Since it is Merdeka, I guess they have an off day today.

Then we shop for grocery. I love going wet market. It can never make me not stopping fascinating the stuffs there. My mum and I love raw vegetables (ulam).We buys a lot of those, especially when they are cheap.

Those stuff contribute to my good complexion.

I love Goreng Pisang in Malaysian.

Then we walk around and buy some food to bring home.Then we do not know how go home as we decide not to take 170 bus. Worse still, the weather is damn warm even in later afternoon. We cross the interchange just to go to the yellow bus terminal.

We decide to take bus 666 via secondlink to Jurong East Interchange.The ticket cost RM7.50 per person. My mum is very shocked to realise that the ticket is very expensive and worse still, she knows that the trip will be very long since there is so many bus-stops along the way.

I give my mum catty, fierce look when she keeps complaining in the bus. I get to know from the driver that the ticket from Jurong East Interchange to Johore BAhrus cost $3. Today, so many people whom I believe are mostly foreigners boarding the bus.

1)Bus CW3 2)Looking very pissed 3)Happy to go home

The journey is indeed a long one but I love to see the unknown environment and appreciate the beauty. I feel at peace seeing those people having such a rustice and slow lifestyle. I wonder how they can be happy with small income.

We reach the Second Link at 7pm but we ahve to wait for more poeple to take the bus ( which apparently none ). At last we reach Jurong East interchange at 8pm.

Again, it is my obligation to go out with my parents but if there is any chance, I will not go on trip with them. Unless my mum takes life easy and she will be more open-minded.

Almighty God

Even Mother Nature does not spare the superpower America. Hurrican Katrina Attacked New Orleans, America. Some say that the disaster is much similar to Tsunami except it only occur only to one state.

The haunting images of New Orleans were those of a Third World nation unable to cope with a natural disaster. The over-riding question in the first days following the hurricane was “What is the government doing?” Americans have been conditioned to look to the federal government as the answer to all their needs.

It can be surpising that America is once more plunged into a snake pit of anarchy, death, looting, raping, marauding thugs, suffering innocents, a shattered infrastructure, a gutted police force, insufficient troop levels and criminally negligent government planning. But this time it's happening in America

When they were deaf for so long to the horrific misery and cries for help of the victims in New Orleans - most of them poor and black, like those stuck at the back of the evacuation line yesterday while 700 guests and employees of the Hyatt Hotel were bused out first - they shook the faith of all Americans in American ideals.

Shame! Click on more details

Let us be thankful to God for the safer conditions we got in Singapore any calamities by helping His less fortunate people who got affected the most.

Mankind faces misery and suffering through natural disasters, such as, earthquakes, hurricanes, tornadoes, volcanic eruptions, avalanches, floods, epidemics, famines, pest infestations, etc. People of faith believe that these are a consequence of God's wrath or anger at humans who committed sins. Sometimes this type of reasoning is not valid because many times innocent and pious people also get killed or suffer.

I just hope that this is not one of the smaller signs of Doomsday. I will get freaked out because I am not ready to meet Him yet

Manic Monday

Today I m in dilemma whether I should attend 2 hours of Bodycombat later because It will be very cardioic experience non-stop but I am a little worried that the class will be very boring and routine especially by Darren.

I decide to skip BodyCombat but attend bodypump by Cheslyn. I am a little bit surpised that there are only four guys attending the class. Apparently, I am peeved by this stocky guy with ' hey i am stronger and muscular than you' attitude. He carries heavy weights throughout the class.

BodyPump is hailed as The Fastest Way in the Universe to Get in Shape. BodyPump is a strength endurance training class where muscle and music collide!It is designed to get you maximum results in the shortest amount of time by working your entire body in one hour. Low on complexity but high in fun, BodyPump has all the benefits of weight training including increased strength, increased metabolism and the "feel good" factor associated with a great total body workout.

It can reverse ageing too as it can reduce the risk of osteoporosis and bone density loss, while increasing energy level

Predictable routines mean that you are successful every time, no matter where you start. You choose the weight that you are comfortable with and as you progress you can continue to challenge yourself with increased load.

Hence I should not whine about these people or turn off by the women who carry much more weights than me.

Because BodyPump is a strength endurance class, much the same principles apply as would for strength training.
BodyPump should be done two to three times a week, with a rest between each time.

Muscular fitness includes both muscular strength and endurance. Muscular strength refers to the maximal force that can be generated by a specific muscle or muscle group. Muscular endurance, on the other hand, is the ability of a muscle or muscle group to exert submaximal force for several repetitions. Muscular strength and endurance are developed by what is referred to as the "overload principle." Overload occurs when the resistance to movement, frequency or duration of activity is increased. This can be accomplished by varying the weight, amount of rest and sets of exercises.

Some facts about muscle-building.

After that, I go to have shower. Before I head to the steamroom. I sit down and notice Gollum is beside me. It is quite eerie especially when the two lights in steamroom are spoilt. I am quite surpised that he can really endure the warm steam for a long time. He looks scary and perverted.

A bald man with very wrinkled skin clad in towel.Disgusting

When I am about to test his endurance level in steamroom ( since I have so much baby fat to burn ), someone I do not want to see enter the steamroom. I just grab my cleanser and exit.

I spend about 15 minutes just to blow my hair so that I can have a same hairstyle at VJ Utt. Then I take bus 190 to Funan IT mall. I go to Challenger store to buy the CD covers ( super cheap ) and How to speak Thai software.

Then I have to beat the working people crowd at City Hall MRT. Thank goodness I manage to get the seat and there is not pregnant woman around.

Then I watch The Dragon Heroes on TCS8 before going for grocery shopping at Prime Market nearby. I buy chicken, chilli sauce, lettuce and vegetable salad dressing.

Then I start to compile the job list so I can send my resumes acoording to the industry.

Sunday Blues

I wake up late today. With splitting headaches.

Hollywood

Party Party

While waiting for David to call me later,I decide to go gym to attend bodypump, followed by the bodycombat and lastly ABT. Today Lily won't be going ABT with me since she will be attending hip hop class at Bugis.

I hear Bugis branch is very nice. Sighs.

Then I decide to buy the hairband, a hair highlighter at Basic Beauty at Heeren. David says that the party will be a blast and we can go in free as his friend is like bigshot.

When I enter the gym, I realise I forget to bring my shoes. No wonder the bag is extraodinarily lighter today.

Wasted trip. And Money.

Then I have to go back home and wait for David to calls me.

Along the journey home, this old man starts to come closer to the woman behind me. The woman rolls eyes at him and continue reading. Then I begin to be very suspicious because he keeps trying to have close proximity with anyone. I just carry on looking at him. True enough, he is trying to grab something from the guy's pouch. And that guy is not aware of it. I just act blur and looks at the scenery when actually my eyes keep eyeing on his action. Then he shifts to other cabin.

best still, he still trying to prey on this lady who is sleeping in the train. He apparently get so close , very close to her , trying to take something from her Louis Vutton or the bracelet. I just keep on eagle's eye on him. Too bad, the lady wakes up when the action starts. She gives that guy a stern stare. Apparenly, She gets pissed to know that that old man is between her both legs. Laugh out loud.

Then I go home and have dinner.

We meet at 7.15pm at Lakeside to go for dinner first. We proceed to Raffles City Food court so that he has his dinner there while I go to Gents to change my earring stud. I do not know that it is such a hassle and pain to have earring. I have difficulty to wear the stud back.

Bling.Bling. I love it.

After dinner, we walk to Funan IT mall because david wants to search for the software there. Too bad, the shop is closed early, hence we do window-shopping at Challeger store. It will be better to wait awhile since COMEX exhibition is coming this thursday at Suntec City.

After that, we walk around the citylink and to HMV store. I bump into Ronnie, a old good friend of mine, rather ex-friend. Apparently, he pretends not to see me even though we face to face with each other. I guess he still not forgive me for my childish behaviour. I have been so long trying to say sorry to him but whether he wants to accept it, it is not my problem.

I am just collecting my karma points.

Then I just do not bother him because I do not want to be embarrased by him perhaps.

Around 10pm, we take a bus and meet david's friend. I make a biggest fool of by myself today in front of stranger. I feel very trashy tonight. I do not know what have gotten over me. Maybe I am wearing Mickey Mouse tanktop.

I think I make a bad impression of myself. Even David is surpised with my cheap antic to be humorous.

Bling Bling

I feel so well-treated when we manage to get the club in free and people around us just look at us with astonishment. Thanks goodness, David gets to know big fucks.

The power of networking.

The party is blast but then I feel “completely drawn inside this underground world of complex characters". Everyone comes into own cliques. I have been observing the people on the dancefloor. I can sense loneliness and insecurities behind those happy faces.It is like people who’s gone to a disco looking for love, life and acceptance.

A weekend of extreme pleasure where rules don’t apply, boundaries are non-existent and physical perfection is demanded.

This is no acceptable. Even David is gone to his old clique. I am alone and bored standing near the dancefloor. As usual, I put on my defensive position and be cool. Just waiting for time's up.

How I wish I am not here suddenly. Partying is not my cup of tea out of the blue.

I must get out of party culture. Even the disco music cannot drown my loneliness.

I think the most important sense for me is to feel I belong somewhere to someone.

Villa Of wellness

Today I do some heavy weight training on shoulder. Then I am being approach by the cute fitness consultant. Literally, I am a little defensive at first because he has nice hairstyle and bods , goes well with his height. He tells me that my technique of using the machine is wrong.

He starts to correct me right and proper technique. Damn I know I do it wrong because I need t gain my shoulder definition fast, hence I forgo the correct way just to gain fast result and I get spotted by the fitness instructor.

Soon after, he asks me whether I hear about personal training session and whether I will be interetsed in taking up the session. I know one session cost so much, at least $80 per hour and I don't see the need to have one actually if I can have someone to train with me. I just tells him that I am still unemployed and perhaps when I have a proper income, I come back to him.

This excuse always works.

Then we talk like we know each other for so long. He did join the male pageant before, specificially, New UrbanMale.com pageant . He is very modest and friendly. Perhaps we barely know each too well.

First impression counts.

Then after that, I go for Bodycombat by Suhaimi. His class is alway full of people. Because he is fun, funny and lively person. I did a great sweatout today.

Then I quickly go home to watch villa of wellness.

Villa of wellness is new reality show about story behind the ladies who are putting their worst sides on TV.They tell us the fun facts behind their courageous move to show it all, cellulite and bulges not withstanding.I love lee huey, christina, ivy and alsia.

I want more bitching.

Society can be so cruel to say it is a sin to be fat. The real "sin" is not trying to change your failures, not trying to change your failing grade, not applying your knowledge of good eating habits, not trying to exercise to keep your body in shape.

"There are no ugly women, only lazy ones." - Helena Rubenstein

The success of Nicole Richie - Drink Coffen Bean

Early Rise

I manage to wake up early just to attend the bodycombat by Cheslyn. Most of the tracks are old and short. I do not sweat it out a lot somehow. Then I attend the Bodypump by Elizabeth after that. I am surpised that Cheslyn says hi to me.

I must acknowlede her next time. I am so snobbish in gym.

Then I have my usual routine ( have 15minutes of steaming in steamroom ) before shower. I just love to see my face get red after that.

I need to have a tanline. I look half-tanned now.

Then I go home to have a lunch. I need to save money.

I browse my old album and see my good friends. I afraid that I am drifting apart from them and eventually disappear in their life. Men don't do friendship nearly as easily, nearly as well as women. Friendships between men involve a bizarre combination of competition, cooperation, insult and one upsmanship. When the friends go away, for whatever reason, all we're left with are ghosts.

Will they remember old esjay

I do not want to be a ghost. Or It is my fault for not being proactive to maintain continous relationship with them.Perhaps as we grow older, our interests change and sometimes this means that a friendship may not be as close as it once was. This also means that I, too, may find a different group of friends to spend time with.

I am so gerontophobic. I have difficulty dealing with aging. I fear death too.

But I miss my friends. When we grow old, we have own life and responsibilty to carry. I don't think they have time to remember me. Am I exaggerating? Am I thinking too much?

Am I getting senile?

or lonely?

The secret of life is not about enjoying the present moment, but about enjoying EVERY moment. This is not an exaggeration, for even on the way to the funeral of one’s spouse, there is time to enjoy the fragrance of flowers, time to rejoice in the memories of the many happy moments spent together, and time to welcome the consolation of friends.

But I don't want to live by the pasts.

For some people making new friends comes easily. For me, it can be a difficult task. The development of a true friendship, whether it’s with one person or many people, is a great feeling. Making and keeping good friends is a challenge for me, whether I am shy or not. I feel inadequate myself surpisingly.

But according toBostonUK,

Esjay
You have a charismatic and magnetic personality which others cannot help but be drawn to ensuring you of many friends. Very ambitious your keen perceptive powers and ability to absorb knowledge helps you to achieve your objectives. You are a strong willed and industrious worker who is prepared to earn all the material success and good fortune which comes your way. With a philosophical attitude happiness is assured.

Contradicting?

I think I am just negotiating transition to 30s. I hate it.

Aging is about finding new ways to understand yourself and others, and grieving what is lost in order to be able to anticipate with joy and wonder what may yet come. By feeling connected to both the past and the future in a balanced way we maintain some integrity in the face of our mortality.

Just admit it, Esjay.

I am just lonely.

Worst Nightmare

Lincoln and my[ perhaps Bunawar ] worst nightmare finally comes true.

Run for Life.

Today a weather is very good, end up going back to sleep till 12pm. I start to cook my own lunch

Vegetarian Claypot rice

I am quite happy that I finish download the mac version of microsoft office. I am used to MS office to AppleWorks.

Then I go to Buona Vista pool for a swim before attending the class at Bouna Vista Community Centre.

Certificate of appreciation

I still cannot banish my bad habit of waking up late till 12pm. I always waste my whole morning. Today I want to make my mum happy. I threw all the rubbish/used lecture notes/old bags/others at the hall which I had been proscratinating to throw them to the chute. Then I water the plant. At 12.30pm, I go to Prime Supermart tom buy groceries ( mostly vegetables ).I spend only $30.

I feel like cooking today. I decide to whip fish dishes with sweet and sour sauce. I cut the crab meat sticks, brocolli, cababage, pineapple, fish fillet, onions, red and green capsicums, sweet corn and carrot.

Big mistake. I only bought one packet of maggi mee brand sweet and sour sauce. It ends up watery.

It looks water despite beautiful colour

Terrible.Nevertheless I enjoy the meal by myself.

Then i go back to NTU to do some computer work, apparently do some job-search.

Is certificates of appreciation, generally important in job-search?

My friend and I are arguing, a friendly debate actually over acquiring knowledge

I mention to him that I just need certificate when I take up the course but he disagrees with me that we shall not acquire knowledge to get certified. Certificate does not prove much especially when the employers see your capability to handle the jobs. We has these example why certificate is not neccesity but of importance in job search.

Recruitment of Cabin crew.

One resume states ' Learnt a basic spanish language'.

Another resumes states ' Acquired level 1 certificate of spanish language by BMC'

I am sure that the employer will prefer the latter resume.Employers are scared to death of hiring the wrong person and know that mistakes in hiring occur all the time.Certificate of Performance is just a tangible proof. Ditto for any letters of recommendation you may have as well as performance reviews or thank-you letters and notes of appreciation or other testimonials from customers or clients, as well as any accomplishments in community or volunteer work.

It may sound redundant but it can make that extra bit of difference.

Why study for Master's or PhD degree, if one can study by your own? We still need a piece of paper to show the hard work, the expenditure and or course the result obtained.

Nothing's wrong to acquire knowledge or skills by yourself but there are some skills/ knowledge such IT skills or businees skills and even languages which require certificates to let your employers know you accomplished them.

We may look for chances to increase our knowledge in these three areas:
1)Skills directly related to the content of your work
2)Skills related to how your work is done, such as new computer systems
3)Skills related to the people side of work, such as communication or diversity training

- Achieve the next level of certificate, license, or credential in your field.
- Catch up on the basic math or language skills you need to begin a certificate program, or to do your job better.
- Start learning or improving the foreign language that would help your employer stay relevant and meet customer needs.
- Take a public speaking course. This can help you present your ideas more effectively at work.
- Take a communications course to help you carry out team projects better, or move into managing people.
- Is there a new emphasis on mediating personnel problems at work? Get qualified in alternative dispute resolution.
- Take an efficiency workshop, to learn new tricks for organizing your time and projects better.
- Do you want more work responsibility but haven't got it yet? Join a community leadership course for practice.
- Explore mentoring opportunities.

Make sure your supervisor knows what skill training you take. Show your willingness to take on new tasks or to update how you accomplish your work. Get certified.

Retail Therapy

It seems raining these few days. However, It does not dampen my shopping mood today. I meet David at Orchard MRT station at 2.30pm. The venue is changed to KinoKuniya Bookstore.

Then we go the toilet at fifth storey as david want to gel up his hair because he does not go back home. He is on reservist period now. Gladfully, he still want to go shopping with me.

David: What! You bring this dry product [ Gatsby's wax ] ?
Esjay: I always use this. Hairgel is so cheapskate and gross.
David: I don't know how to use this.
Esjay: Same application except it is dry. Just take a little, spread on ur palm and apply on your hair.
David: Sure or not?
Esjay: Well, it's according to the instruction.
David[ looks at the container]:But it's in japanese.

I go to Perlini's store to get myself a necklace because the previous I bought broke. I feel naked without anyting on my neck.

Then we decide to have lunch first at Lucky Plaza because I have not taken mine yet. We go to Watson's store to buy cough syrup as David is having a cough due to long stay at the army camp. I realise the place remind me of Baobae plaza at Bangkok. Everyone seems to speak non-english here.

The Lucky Plaza is always crowded because it is Sunday. The foodcourt is packed with people hence we decide to change venue to nearest foodcourt at Scotts. Before that, I buy writeable CDs cost me $30.

Then I have Indian vegetarian food for my lunch since the queue at Yong Tau Foo stall is so long. The food sucks big time and worse still it cost $3.80. Wasteful.

Esjay: Damn! there, a male model , 12 o'clock. [ he is chatting with a MAC sale assistant ]. Let's hide.
David: Where? How u know he is model? He does look like a model.
Esjay: Faster hide. [ Pull david to nearest counter ]
Salesgirl: Hi, can I help you?
Esjay: No, just browsing [ never realise that it is cosmetic counter]
David: Why you want to hide?
Esjay: I must not let him see me in ugly clothes.
David: He knows you?
Esjay: Duh!

We walked to Far East Plaza [ People here are so beautiful ]. We window-shop around and manage to find a kiosk which sells cheap shades. I buy two shades [ same size of the Nicole's and the same shape of Aaron Kwok ] for only $12.90 + $8.90 together.

Fulfilled.

Along the way, we talk about our mutual friends which struck me a dialogue from Mean Girls.
Regina: We do not have a clique problem at this school.
Gretchen: But you do have to watch out for "frenemies".
Regina: What are "frenemies"?
Gretchen: Frenemies are enemies who act like friends. We call them "frenemies".
Karen: Or "enemends".
Gretchen: Or friends who secretly hate you, we call them "fraitors".
Regina: [rolls eyes] That is so gay.
Karen: [gasps] What if we called them "mean-em-aitors"?
Regina: [scoffs]
Gretchen: No, honey, it has to have the word "friend" in it.
Karen: Oh...

Since David needs to book in later at night, our shopping period is quite in rush. The last stop will be at Heeren. I want to buy a trunk from NUM stores but somehow I am a little bit skeptical with the cutting and the colour beside the colour

Low-waist. Loose Front. Tight Bum. WTF

Trunk is just trunk, why need to be so fanciful and gay?

Esjay: So many type! I like this green one. Very normal.
David: Don't you ever choose that?
Esjay: Why? Anything green is beautiful, especially on me.
David: Someone bought it before you.
Esjay: How thrilling! I do not know he likes green too.
David:I shopped with him before.
Esjay: Thanks. I don't know I can make green famous colour.

Then I decide not to buy the trunk but instead I get a pink knitted top from Jean Pierre. Stunning. I also get myself pierced again. This is first time for David to see someone get pierced. I even buys a handphone strap because I am going to persuade my mum to buy me a new handphone with camera.

Ngage does not suit my appearance.

Esjay: From Far East to here, how come most guys sport army crew cut hairstyle and wear tight fitting clothes.
David: How they are short in height too? Very clony.
Esjay: They remind me of Oompah Loompah except they have good fashion sense and good hairstyle.
David: True.

Then David's friend comes and meets us. We have a chitchat for awhile before going back home. Then last stop at Bossini. David get himself a bag cost only $17 so he can put his laptop inside.

We take train home with sense of fulfilment.

We are testing my shades and the clothes I wear today

Tired Legs

My Legs are aching.

Lily does not attend the class today, hence gives me an excuse not to go also.

I decide to go to McDonalds Restaurant at King Albert's Park.

I want to top my ezlink at Boon Lay interchange but the queue snake all the way to information board. Then I take a train to Clementi and perhaps top up mine there and take 154. But once I reach there, the lady show me pieces of $50 dollars as she does not have any $10 notes changes. Furiously, I take train to Buona Vista Station and get my ezlink topped up there. I walk to Holland Village despite drizzle. Then I take bus 61 to Bukit Tima Road.

Damn! The bus does not stop opposite King Albert Park but Bukit Timah Plaza. I have to walk a distance to the destination. Today, I suppose to relax my leg yet I do a lot of walking today.

I order McChicken meal and do my reading and planning. I feel like a student when I am McDonalds.I'm just loving it.

Then I go back home at 9pm.

Today, I open my blog and receive a comment from 'good-looking korean'. I delete his/her comment without thinking. I realise what I did is wrong since everyone is entitled to opinion. David laughs at the silly comment made [ because he is part of the trio] . True enough, I shall not bother much about reader being shallow who only keens on surface but not the substance.

Dear reader,

This is my blog and people who reads mine needs to show respect to the owner but that's problem faced by any bloggers. At least I have something/topic to write today.

It's better to be hated for what you are, than to be loved for what you are not.

I judge people, i think that we all do, it's part of human nature and we can't really help it.Everyone gets an impression whether he/she likes it or not. The best one can do is try and be charitable and forgiving in own judgements and give people a chance to change their image in your mind.

Making a judgment without any true observation is dickhead-bashing, which is always in style. If you're gonna judge someone (and believe me, it's unavoidable), better to do so based on the person's beliefs rather than, say, their looks. At least your judgment might be slightly more accurate, or at least more fair, if you consider the more important facets of people, like beliefs, personality, actions, thought/opinions.

So what I self-praise or making fool of myself? Who does not? You should re-evaluate your criteria for choosing how you feel about me.

Boths are beautiful in their own way, but if I am to be judgemental, I will be prefer the Indonesian babe[right] to korean babe because she has beautiful,big eyes

I think that to some degree you might judge people based on your beliefs. It's only how far you go in acting on those automatic and natural prejudices that becomes a problem.There's absolutely nothing wrong with making judgements, as long as you don't act in an inappropriate or disrespectful way. I do not saying that you judge wrongly but you don't know me well.

Look of the person varies, and don't judge people based on one set of photo.

If you cannot accept the usage of words in my blog or me indulging in enormous self-praise [ which I don't ]. Fuck off!

Regardless of how open-minded I am, I always have an opinion on another. I'm one of the most accepting individuals, yet I reach conclusions about people very quickly too. All I know, at the moment, you can't wait to get my attention . You succeeded.

P.S Hell no! I am not bruised because your comment are mild compared to people's bitchy comments previously. I am happy that there are non-Singaporean like you make me feel apprciated and amused.

P.S I am not targeting to the majority of a certain country I mention above.Generally, I am stating my stand that don't judge th book by its cover.

sign off
Esjay

Spending me time alone

My life is back to normal again.

No more spending time outside at nights every nights. No more spending money on food/beverage at high-class cafe. No more listening to pessimistic ramblings occasionally.

I am grateful for certain people for giving me freedom to maximise my time prioritize my goals.

People will be surpised that me, a hardcore clubber, social butterfly and night owl, stay at home almost every night. Let's put this way that I have better direction in my life. Kind of late though but not too late.

I can take control of my time without feeling guilt now so I can achieve my dreams as quickly and effectively as I can.

birthdate

JANUARY:
Stubborn and hard-hearted.
Ambitious and serious. Loves to teach and be
taught. Always looking at people's flaws and
weaknesses. Likes to criticize. Hardworking and
productive. Smart, neat and organized. Sensitive
and has deep thoughts.
Knows how to make others happy. Quiet unless
excited or tensed. Rather
reserved. Highly attentive. Resistant to illnesses
but prone to colds.
Romantic but has difficulties expressing love.
Loves children. Loyal.
Has great social abilities yet easily jealous. Very
Stubborn and money cautious.


What does your birth month say about you?
brought to you by Quizilla

True Traits of mine.I wonder it applies te same to January kids

School

I spend my whole day in NTU, more specificially at Library 1. Luckily, i bring my Adidas jacket as it is raining. I spend most of time, doing a job search and compiling the job into excel sheet.

It is very tedious and mundane job but still I have to do it. I need money.

I want to have a grand birthday party next year.

I take a break at 4pm to have a bite. On the way there, I meet Bao outside the library.

Esjay: Hi! Nice to see you here.
Bao: Yeah, Why you still here? Did YOU graduate?
Esjay: Yeah I did. I just come here to use the terminal to look for job.
Bao: You sure?
Esjay: Yeah! I have been slacking in job search and my life.
Bao: good
Esjay: go to go. I m very hungry .

I go back home at 8.30pm.

I find out that a friend has found a new social circle. I guess I will be spending my quality time alone again.

Time's off.

Party.Booze.Sex.Social.Skin.Fame.

Vices.

BV

I suppose to go gym today but once I reach at Somerset, I change my mind and take a bus 106 to Holland Village. Then I have a lunch at Burger King Restaurant and do some reading on my job search. I need quite different resumes for different specialization. I don't think I want to do sales anymore. I want to do something to contribute to society such as teacher.

But my dream is already dashed.

Then I hang out for a while, then I go for a swim at Buona Vista pool. When I am about to shower, I do not bring my towel. I use my gym tanktop as a towel to wipe me dry. I feel so embarrased. I am incompletely dry.

Then I have a dinner at Windmill foodcourt. I feel so hungry after so many laps just now.

Then I attend the class at Buona Vista Community Centre at 7pm. The trainer keeps asking my nationality which he does not completely agree that I am Singaporean. Hence I just give him the answer he wants to hear.

The class is fun and the students are of so many different nationality.

I go back home.

Revamp

My legs are still aching. I go gym and do some training on my shoulder and arms. Then I go to Sim Lin square to buy connector for N-gage. The weather is scorching hot and I have to walk from Bugis MRT to the complex and walk back to MRT station.

I decide to go home and skip the forum by AIA. I guess I wont waste time on this only job opportunity that takes so much time these days. I know being FSC, one can earn good money as long as one is a good salesman and work hard to reach his/her target. But I am tired of doing sales.

I go home and take a long nap.

I think I need to revamp my blog layout and perhaps contents. Wait, I should just maintain my own writings and thoughts with my own personal touch. Why must I need to be controversial and ah-bengish to increase traffic?

It is my own blog. My uniqueness.

Add drama(tic) measure to make my life interesting like MTV but not to be drama queen.

Life without drama is life, just life.

Spending My time

I am being awaken by Bee Lan's morning call. Actually it is 12.30pm and it is not morning. she asks me whether I want to meet up for lunch later but it is so sudden , hence I reject the offer but will meet her one of the days later.

I don't believe that she go shopping just after she came back from Shanghai yesterday.

I stay at home again. I am doing the job search again and redo my resume.

I do not know that job search is very tiring and energy consuming.

My mum just back from her vist to my grandma's house. She just gave a National Day bag pack to my little cousin. My cousin asks my mum where the flag is. He is too smart for a young kid. My mum actually wants the flag for keepsake as she wants it to act as a decor for next year's National Day in front of the house.

My mum has to give in and will give the flag when she meet him again.

Saturday nite

Today, I spend my day alone and peacefully. Apparently not.

I go to gym to attend the bodycombat by christina. I decide to wear a cap to conceal my hideous hair. Plus, I am wearing shorts to do bodycombat and ABT later.

No kicking, No jumping and no stretching.

I don't want people behind me to enjoy te spectacle of me falling copiously out of my shorts in the class.

Then Lily comes and attends the ABT class with me. Surpisingly, the class is not that crowded like last week.

Is there a big party carry out later?

Then I go to sauna room since the steam room is spolit. I hate sauna room because any metallic accesories on my body get hot and burn my delicate skin. I don't like the feeling of heated hair ( plus striking conversation with people inside ). I just listen to the conversation made by James S and his friend inside ( mostly regarding the new gym at Bugis)

Then I go back home to rest. My legs are really aching like hell. but I am still not satisfied with my legs. I still think ithe thighs are still not toned yet.

I hate doing squat.

Kern calls me out of sudden whether I am going to club later. She feels a little bit alone today , so she can chill out with me a while if I am going. Today no one is asking me out so I stay at home. morever she calls me at 11pm. Then I decide to accompany her but is stopped by her because i don't want to feel left out later. I guess I will be staying at home then.

I promise kern to meet up one of the days then.

I spend my night doing a job search.

I just got rejection letter again from NIE. Suddenly I feel lost and slightly disappointed. Perhaps God has a better plan for me in long run. i cannot deny that life is a test. Everyone has his/her own test. I just ahve to strengthen my will further.Time to remould my future plan again.

We often get emotionally disappointed when certain actions, moral behavior or events in our life don’t meet own expectations. We sometimes measure things or plan for certain outcomes according to our personal standards and wishes. We even tend to expect others in our lives to be on the same exact track of thinking, which in return accentuates our criticizing attitude and increases the severity of our disappointment with them.

When things turn against our plans or wishes we lose hope. When we study and analyze our traits, it becomes easier to recognize our shortcomings and mistakes.

Dwelling heedlessly on this bitter feeling of disappointment may lead to rage, anger, resentment or a deep sense of loss and sadness. This is the negative side that Satan immediately introduces to us when he senses our deviation from the straight path.

BANISH the Satan and be optimistic. Nevertheless, I am just a human with no supernatural power.

A lone

I love to donate. It make me happier.

Plus the money is not mine but my parents, hence they will be blessed by God with good health and wealth. I am just a messenger,

I spend my day at home because I realise my money is getting depleting. Last time, I have concession card but now travelling is like a waste of money.

I am getting bored and my blog is getting boring. Time for everyone to know me well.

Favorite Flower: Sunflower
Favorite Scent: Le Male by Jean Paul Gaultier
Favorite Authors: Roahl Dahl and Dan Brown
Favorite Book: Da vinci Code
Favorite Condiment: Sambal Belachan
Favorite Pair of Shoes: Gucci sneaker
Favorite Local Channel: Any drama star chen li Ping
Favorite Beauty Products: Concealer by MAC
Favorite Magazines: Men's health (local)
Favorite Cookie: Chocolate Chip
Favorite Ice Cream: Chocolate chip
Favorite Chocolate: Toblerone
Favorite Junkfood: Big Mac
Favorite Restaurant: Rice Table restaurant
Favorite Months: January and December
Favorite Number: 1
Favorite Day: 15th
Favorite Fastfood Joints: Subway and Burger King
Favorite T.V. Shows: Simple Life, Charmed, One Tree Hill
Dream Car: Rolls Royce
Favorite Comedian: Selena Tan
Favorite Subject: Fashion
Favorite Radio Station: Lush 99.9
Favorite Occasion: My birthday
Favorite Cartoon Characters: Simpsons
Favorite Fashion Designers: Gucci
Favorite Clothing Store: Zara
Name of Pet(s): Meg
Favorite Athlete(s): None
Favorite Sport(s): Tennis, Water sports
Preferred Brand of Jeans: Levis
Favorite Accessory: Necklace with E pendant
Favorite Fruit: Kiwi
Favorite Vacation Spot: Bangkok
Favorite Drink: Fruit Juice
Favorite Food: Nasi Lemak
Favorite Hangout: Coffee Bean & Tea Leaf, Essential Brew
Favorite Dessert: Brownies
Favorite Movie(s): Anything blonde
Favorite Cable Channel(s): Starworld
Toothpaste: Darlie
Favorite Cake: Nut and chocolate
Trademark Expression: How thrilling!
Usual Get-up: Jeans, Tee,
Favorite Place: Sentosa

Updating

I think I am putting unnecessary expectation to myself that cause stress and fatigue.

I collect some datas on job search online and how to make new resumes. I have so many issues to resolve at the moment before starting planny my next career action steps.

How/where do I start to explore working aboard?
I am thinking of working for myself but what should I do?
I need advice on my resume and cover letter.
I am not unsure of the skills I have that transferable to the employment.
My recent grades were not to good. I am nots ure I am in the right course.
My skills are not as useful for my next career move as i thought they would be
Balance my work and life destination at the same time.

Worse, my mum keeps pressurizing to get the job, especially engineering and teaching position. I am not that smart and lucky like my sister. After-argument wit my mum makes me feel like I am a bad son and I hate this feeling.

I go to school at 8pm and use the computer lab at south spine area. Unfortunately, I have not enough amount on my cashcard to do printing. I just continue my searching online and enjoy the big monitor and airconditioning. I guess I will be coming to the school every night.

For now. Enjoy

Some Erotic national day message

click me to watch fireworks

Happy National Day

I manage to wake up early despite sleeping late yesterday. i immediately call David to confirm the plan to watch movie later. I just afraid I may not get the ticket because it is holiday and the only safer way to book online.

I try booking online but I do not have any credit card at all. I call David to help me book the ticket for me. He will go and look for AXS machine and book the show. Sam calls me what's my plan later and whether I am keen to go for a swim.

I start to pack my stuff when david calls me that he cannot the booking because the machine does not print the receipt.He asks me to book the tickets by phone. I am already outside and how will I know the cinema's number.

Calm down.

I go to GV cinema at jurong Point and find the AXS machine. I try to book using that machine but the problem is that I DON'T have atm card. Why I am so pathetically poor. Then I decide to buy newspaper and take a train. Then This uncle distribute Today newspaper to everyone. I waste 80c when I get the information form TODAY.

Bad luck.

Then I try using the phone to book the ticket. It is quite easy, actually and for years, I do not know that I can book by phone. I miss the collection code.

Panic.

I call David about this and he say it is ok since I leave my NRIC number. Then I am not sure whether I shall collect the ticker first or meet Sam first who is the Fitness First gym. He just have hair trim at Far East Plaza and then take a shower to wash up. Then I decide to go and meet Sam first.I wait for him at Valentino Boutique for a while.

Then we have a lunch at Cineleisure Foodcourt and have our usual meals: Yong tau Foo (me) and Fish Soup (Sam). Then We decide to collect the tickets at Marina Square.We take a bus there but the bus stops at Carlton Hotel as the road is blocked due to National Day Parade. We have to walk to Marina Square.Along the way, we bump into Kern, ever-sweet girl who is going tow atch movie later.

The city hall is filled with so many people that they need a police authorities to regulate the human traffic. I am quite worried that I may not reach the place on time to collect the ticket. It is because they will just cancel my booking and let those tickets open to public.

Sam and I rush there as fast as we can but Sam tells me to relax and slow down. I am not actually. Because of that. Sam gets injured and really pissed off.I manage to get the tickets at 3.23pm. Only after that, Sam starts to get angry with me. He starts to talk sense into me regarding my attitude and behaviour that cause injury to him.

Lesson learnt: I shall not argue with anyone despite being right. If I starts to argue with people, I want to win in the argument. This may cause hatred and loss of friendship. I just listen and keep quiet. I don't want to make same mistake.

As long as I get the tickets, I meet my agenda for today. Whatever happens next, I just act dumb or get over it.

After a very awkward moments at Kopi Tiam, David calls me that he reach the place. We just go and meet David there. Then, Sam tells David that he is pissed at the moment and tells David what's happened. I just smile at david sheepishly because David knows that it is not my fault entirely and he is involved too.

Anyway, we just go inside the cinema and wait for these 15 minutes of commercials to end. Well, Sam is really very angry with me , for sure. Then he leaves the theater.

He comes back with bucket of popcorn and shares with us. He is not that petty, after all. He knows I am try hard to save the friendship. Anyway my objective, my childhood dream to watch Charlie and Chocolate Fcatory is fulfilled.

I love the show and oompah loompah.

Then we take pee at Oriental Hotel. I think their toilets are classy.Then we walk around esplanade and find so many peeople by the river. Then David is very hungry so we walk back to Marina Square to look for place to eat. We settle at Long john's Silver Restaurant.The queue is super long and there is no more chicken available.

We trio order the fish wrap as our dinner. I line up while they help to book the place.At 7.45pm, the place starts to get deserted. Then we start to join thousands of Singaporean at the Marina Square empty space. We wait for awhile. It is Sam's first time to watch fireworks live.

Different ways to enjoy fish wrap - Sam eat the pita bread first and save the best( the fish) for last,David spread the chilli sauce on the fish and munch and me, squeeze the chili sauce on the servette and dip my fish wrap on it and eat.

The best things in life are free.

At 8,15pm, the fireworks start fill the dark skies. It feels great to enjoy the moments with other Singaporeans.The smiles, the shouts, laughter and romance. I feels so beautiful and lucky , even to celebrate the moment with good friends.I did some recordings too. It is not that spectacular actually but I had fun.

Then we walk back to City Hall but we decide to hang out at Pacific cafe for awhile , to let the super-crowd disperse. We know the city hall will be jammed with people from Marina Square as well as those who attend the National Day Parade.

I must get the tickets next year.

I bring my ibook along actually. My plan is, We secure the place at Marina Square, have a picnic ( I even bring a mat along ), kill times by watching Simple Life 3 in my ibook. Eventually the places are already filled.

Then we watch "Little Britain" comedies (I finish download) while enjoying our drinks.We have a good laugh actually. Then we start to go home at 10pm because everyone is tired. Both of them need to work tommorow.

Nice Fireworks and Pacific Cafe

Luckily, it is not crowded at MRT station.

I have a fulfilled day today and I feels happy
1) Fulfil my teenage dream to watch Charlie and Chocolate Factory
2) Celebrate National Day with good friends.
3) My character improves.

Good looking trio

Spend at home

Spend my time with family today.

The main reason is I do not have money to go out. I skip the fireworks countdown at Marina Square with Derek. And I skip going clubbing with Derek also.

I look like a mop now. Scary

We enjoy the salad more than our main dish

Wedding

I have to wake up early due to my parents' obligation. I need to help out for my grand-auntie's son's wedding later. I am not the earliest actually. I go to my younger uncle and do washing of dishes. People are curious about who I am. Perhaps due to my long hairstyle. My hands are ruined due to 5 hours of soaking in dishwashing liquid,They look like ten prunes.

Then I decide to leave early and I lie to my mum that I need to attend my friend's wedding at Ang Mo Kio later. I feel bad actually when I leave suddenly. Morever I feel so left out because I have nothing to strike conversation with people there.

To them, I am just an educated , arrogant brat who are aloof and proud. I am not but they love to project me in that way.

Humans.

Then I go home and pack my stuff and meet Sam at Buona Vista MRT station at 3.15pm. We decide to go Sentosa again. Quite a number of people still go to Sentosa at this time. Perhaps it is National Day'eve'eve. We take a bus yellow and alight at Tanjung Beach. I need to change because I am wearing shoes, shirt and jeans.

I do get constant stares by those beach people.

Then we take a bus to Tanjung Beach because Sam wishes to see the crowd at Tanjung Beach. We love there because the crowd is much of our age and people are so gorgeous. But we need to bring some girls to km8 bar to chill out. I am not that enthuastic to take off my top and parade.

I don't have greek bod yet.

Sam: I think I am ugly
Esjay: Gasps. If you are ugly, then what makes me? a beast?

Anyway we plan the last minute trip today. Hence we go to the same place( the small island opposite sunset bay) to chill out. It is almost 6.30pm so we decide to go and have shower. We aboard the bus and the bus end up at departure stop. My pants are still wet and sandy. I feel so uneasy to go town with wet bermuda.

At Harbourfront MRt station, we are stopped for security check.

Man: Can you both stop for security check?
Esjay: Sure ( open his bag for him to check )
Man: You both just back from Sentosa
Esjay: Yeah
Man ( to Sam): You too, please.
Man: There is camera there so need to show a little bit for the security .
Esjay and Sam roll eyes: That's hot ( smile at surveillance camera)

We decide to go to our own gym to take shower. I go to cold storage to buy the padlock before proceeding to gym.Then we meet at cineleisure foodcourt to have our dinner. I have yong tau foo where Sam has his usual fish soup.

After that, I recommend Sam to this cafe, Galilee cafe at 6th storey at Cineleisure. Sam is so thrilled because he can watch MTV there. We have free flow of soup there too. I have dinosaur and Sam ahve cookie and cream drink. The feedback is good from him. He really enjoys the ambience there.

Thanks to my recommendation. I love Galilee because of the surrounding. How I wish I have cafe like this.

life is short

I wake up early because I have job interview at Queensway. I decide to wear tie and a shirt and skip my breakfast. I afraid I may be late. I reach early at 10am. Hence I have breakfast at McDonalds despite having stomachache. I just forgone the chilli sauce and pepper. I kill time by reading newspaper.

Then I walk to AIA tower under scorching sun. I get my security pass, my bag being checked and being usher by cleaning auntie. I am early but 15minutes. I get to meet mr ex-ntu student cum manager, Mr Thio. I get fill up the personality questionnaire and my particulars. Then I wait and enjoy 15 minutes before he and other guy, kelvin ( I guess) come to start the interview.

I know it - It is the job as the financial planner. During interview, they keep asking what is my driving force, my dream and anything irrelevant to the position.I am just being myself and answer accordingly. Perhaps they want to rate my speaking skills. I think they are impressed with my answers and me of course.

Esjay: Money is my main driving factor but it is the passion you need to have that make the job well done. Then one have sense of fulfilment and satisfaction on top of monetary

Impressive statement by me.

Then they start to elaborate more about the jobscope. I am not that keen in becoming one but more interested in how the corporate ladder and the their respective pay. I am quite amazed by their salary system which i consider very tempting but this kind of job needs perservance and hard work. Morever it is customer oriented job.

I am not sure why I always get the things I least expected but when I want something I hope or expect, i end up disappointed. Most of the job I get to the interview level, mostly I will get the job. I does not know the feeling of rejection yet except my application to NUS.

I try so hard to give dumb questions and being himbotic yet they accept me. There will be second round when i have to meet a corporate team to talk more about the job. It means I am going to make fool of myself there and either they or me reject my application as financial planner.

The interview ends at 1pm. Then I walk to IKEA store and buy some storage boxes and magazine racks. There is discounts for other stuff but short of cash. Anyway I have donate twice for the flag day for Cancer Society.

I go home and change as I need to go town. But I have no clothes at all now. I don't want to wear sleeveless clothes because it does not suit my new hairstyle. I opt for old-fashioned polo tee. I must act cute this saturday.

Then I go for bodycombat class by Christina. The trouble is I look messy after jumping, turning and moving fast. I think the aunties look at me with disgust because every break, I keep looking at the mirror to do my hair instead of drinking water.

Then Yvonne and Lily attend ABT with me. I just love ABT nowadays. It make my thighs and abds rock hard. I heard doing squat can make one lose weight fast. And that is what I need most.

I feel good after class.

Then I go and meet Sam at Cineleisure Foodcourt to have dinner. I have my usual meal; Yong Tau Foo. There are so many gorgeous people today.

Then we walka round and decide to settle at Coffee Beans Cafe at Takashimaya S.C. I bring my ibook along but I forget the password and userid to enjoy the internet access. Hence we just watch the Simple Life 3 shows while enjoy our snapples. We have heart laughs at Nicole/Paris funny antics. Then my ibook battery goes flat. Hence we just chill out awhile before going to meet Derrick later.

Even my handphone battery goes flat soon. I hang out at one of the pub while waiting for Derek to sms me.

Charlie and Chocolate Factory Movie is finally here. I have been reading the book since secondary school. I simply love Oopah Loompahs and Violet. I just cannot wait to see the novel come to life.

Nothing much today beside studying at home.

The situation is deteroriating. Things are collapsing around me. It is not the result of me having done anything wrong. Maybe some aspect of my life which has until now been important no longer serves my best interest.It belongs to the cycle which is coming to an end.

Because a new situation/people needs to come ino being, the old has to die. Avoid confrontation. No point bringing people's lie and pretense to the surface or pin point people's weakness without their permission. Or the consequence could be devastating.

I act blur but I am not ignorant or dumb. Trying to be nice guy.

Just being cooln and disinterested, I will give nobody the opportunity to undermine me. I can start to look forward from here.

Home again

Today I spend whole day at home. I just too lazy to go out, even going to gym. I just feel so bored stiiff at home, hence I decide to go community library at Jurong Point. I manage to get good books and then go to Banquet foodcourt to buy fish noodle soup that cost me $5.50.

I felt so cheated.

Then I spend my time looking for job online and read the books I borrow just now.

My four ++ experiences in NTU soon

The environment is hostile to me in some respect. Of course, this will change.In the meantime, I have no choice but to resign myself to keeping a low profile. Everytime, I try to coomunicate my views, I will meet with negative response.I guess my values are quite different to those of the people around me.

I could be well be the object of somebody's envy or resentment.

Refuse to let anything others may say or do undermine my stability and self-confidence.in due course, i will emerge the winner, right.I just stop any conforntation ( wich i always do ). Other won't be sympathetic to me. I wont be tempted to the point out the error of their ways. This would make matters worse.

Be true to myself and take a back seat. Look after myself and wait for the situation to improve. I must tune my brain to know that change for better will not happen overnight.

Now, it is difficult time. There is great potential for a change to a much better situation, but nothing is settled yet. Yet nothing in my past experience can guide me in this instance.

Some brilliant guys told me:
1) Be absolutely clear in my own mind what I want the income to be.
2) Make sure thate ach step I take leads me in that direction.
3) Proceed with utmost caution.
4) use common sense
5) Be streetwise and adaptable
6) Stay on the alert for signs that my approach is not working.
7) Be very wary.
8) Provided I take nothing for granted, success is guaranteed.

I have so many unrealistic expectations of myself that make me give up halfway. I am tempted to take risks in an effort to hurry things along. I do not realise that things can easily go wrong, hence fears and insecurities can surface.

I must fight battle of my own. The struggle with my ego, the problems it create for me, or with another person. In anyway, I MUST take all my courage and will-power to win the fight

Against myself.

Low profile of esjay.

lily Bday

I skip my training session in the morning due to rain again. I just wake up at 11am as I know I need to meet lily later in town. I eat my brunch while watching Scrooge at HBO channel. I am late as usual. I take train to Somerset and reach at 2.11pm. There is no sight of Lily so I call her and she asks me to wait for her for another 5 minutes. Thanks goodness, I am not late.I just listen to Corrine May CD at HMV while waiting for her.

There she comes, with green tube. Sexy. She asks me where we shall eat - Sakae Sushi or NYDC cafe. I hate to make decision at the moment but since we are at the first floor, I decide to choose NYDC since it is our first time. We are being served by the nice malay guy, kamil ( I think so ).We cannot decide what to have. After browsing, I choose parmesan mushroom spaghetti and Lily orders Chicken Pizza. We share salad and potato soup. We add $4 more to have a set lunch.

Lily; What kind of tea do you serve ?
Waiter: We have earlgrey and ice lemon tea.
Esjay: Then I have iced lemon tea
Lily: How about coffee?
Waiter: we have only hot coffee and iced coffee.
Lily: Then I have hot one.
Waiter: You want it to be served now or later.
Lily: later . Then to Esjay : You better get your drink first.
Esjay: Ok. Is my tea served hot or chilled?
Lily and waiter roll eyes.
Lily: It is ICED lemon tea.
Esjay: yeah hor.

While waiting for food, we decide to watch movie after that but still not sure what movie to watch. I give her a little present self-made by me. Not that pricy or even expensive gift for her. I cannot afford to but one but maybe I afford my time to spend time with her on her birthday.

We enjoy the salad more than our main dish

I regret my decision to choose NYDC cafe for our lunch. The food sucks. this is my first time I do not finish my food. I just hate it. And Tobasco sauce is horrible. I only love salad and potato soup. I do not even enjoy my iced lemon tea. NYDC cafe is just famous for its cakes, rather those dishes they whip.

I just hate it.

See my expression above. Apparently I enjoy the salad and Lily's pizza only.

Esjay: Which movie you want to watch?
Lily: I'm easy with choice. How about island?
Esjay: Oh. We have two choices. One with digital format and one does not. So which one you prefer?
Lily: Of course, digital format.
Esjay; Why? The other one use VCR to run the movie?

I want to pay for the meal actually but I only pay $20 but Lily pay the balance. I think I have the right to treat her on her birthday but she understands that I do not work yet.

Lily is enjoying the music I burnt for her and I am just expressing myself.

Then we walk to Cineleisure slowly because we are damn full. Then we reach there. We are still undecided what movie to watch. Now, we choose either sin city or the island. At last, We just buy tickets for Sin City at 4.45pm.Now, lily inisists on paying for the tickets.Then we go to Takashimaya S.C because I need to return books at the library there. Then we walk back slowly just to make our digestive system working. We still have 30 minutes.

We go to the toy shop just to browse but I do not know that Lily love Winnie the pooh. How can the male bear has a name of girl. It is so gay but he is a good leader anyway. Lily buys herself a Hello Kitty Coin bank which I cannot understand why.

Lily is surrounded by pooh bears

Time to go in the cinema now. The Sin City reminds me of Dick Tracy and Kill Bill vol 1 and 2. It is the most disgusting and gross movie I have watched since Kill Bill. There are too much violence and gore. I even flinched at the certain scenes which i find very disturbing. There are few frontal nudity fo female form. It is kind of funny to watch such show with a girl. I mean that actress really has breast and bum and she just appear in the big screen. Weird.

Esjay: gross!!!
Lily: Yeah, I don't understand the plot or soever but now I know why it is uncut version of Sin City.
Esjay: Why? Is it longer than the one with cut version?

We skip the idea of going to gym because we suddenly lethargic after movie. However, Lily has a craving for some cake. I decide that we go and check out the Galilee Friends cafe, former lips cafe at 6th storey,cineleisure. We order brownie with ice-cream and mousse.

I love BROWNIES.

I supposed to wait for Sam to meet me at Cineleisure because he is at the town. But then we already finish our brownies, hence I accompany Lily to MRT station. One the way, I donate 20c to the NUS undergraduate who does the tin donation because today is their flag day. I do a good cause. Then we bump into Sam who looks dazed from the far. It must be his working fatigue. Sam wish birthday to Lily and then bid goodbye to Lily.

I hope she enjoys her day today with her angel

We then walk to Cineleisure Foodcourt since Sam wants to have his dinner there. He orders Chicken cutlet from Taiwan Cafe beside Cafe Cartel before changing seat outside. He orders fish soup with rice as dinner. I am just too full to take anymore food. I just accompany him only.

Then we walk to Cheers store to buy drinks but the drinks here are so expensive.Hence we walk the nearest 7-Eleven store and also realise that the drinks are equally expensive.

Esjay: Hey, what you looking for at Guardian?
Sam: I am looking for sweet.
Esjay: huh? Guardian do sell sweets?
Sam: Yeah, it is speacial kind of sweet.
Esjay: But Guardian is pharmacy leh. i don't think they sell sweets.
Sam: It is a special kind of sweet but they don't sell here. sighs

Then we go shopping at Cold Storage supermarket. Sam manage to get her special sweet and also a cheap drink whereas I buy myself some muesli snack for my breakfast. I need to lose some weight.

Sam: Why buy so healthy food? Siao!
Esjay ( beat his stomach like a drum) You hear this. I am so fat now.
Sam: If you are fat, then I am obese.
Esjay: But you are cuter.

Then we hang out awhile at Mcdonald. So I buy large fries and we both enjoy the fries slowly and talk about music again. Then Sam wants to buy belts. So we quickly go to Bossini store to check the belt out since it is 9.30pm and it may be close soon. He manages to get the belt at $22. Then we take bus home.

It has been a long day today but I enjoy very much despite spending money much.

healthy snack and "special sweet". That is Sam, good-looking but camera shy guy

At last, I manage to convince him to take photo. Anyway, I spend my time searching for job. Oh yeah, I get the call from AIA to come down for interview this sat. I am not sure whether to have my haircut

Dilemma.

home

New Month again. Waste of one month previously.

I think I am wasting my time again and too lazy to find job. I am going to start now. All I can do is prepare the ground in small ways for the changes to come. I must use the time of waiting to make plans, agther information and perhaps discuss possiblities with my friends.

I am patient but not my mum, she is being pressurized by the constant bombardment of my aunties' question about my being.Can they mind their own business at times?

I afraid that lack of confidence in my abilities could lead me to act stupid. I may risk trying to force matters even though circumstances are obviously against me.

I should take life as it comes. Do not be demandind of others.Be content to go at my own pace.