Again

Again, I miss the surf and sweat event through my univesity life. I am still not confident yet to show off my bods in front of so many undegraduates in NTU who attend the such big sport event. No wrong guess if the people who attend the event shall have killer bod for anyone to drool over or even get envious of.

I rather stay at home rather than being mocked at.I know there will be no one who bother who I am but just those voices in my mind keep saying hurtful words to diminish my self-esteem and even confidence to go to Surf and Sweat.I feel like Mary Roach.Scary.

Then I stay at home before I go to King Albert park to do some revision and planning for this week. Yes, planning to be a better man.

I go home around 9pm since my mum do spot check to where I am located at the moment. She just come back from johore Bahru again with my aunties but this time my sis's turn to drive to Johore Bahru.

Drinking session

Today, I rest at home whole day after a good workout yesterday. I meet Tee later at Orchard Road as He need to use the Tangs voucher to buy some products. I meet him at Clementi and take bus 7 to town.

After that, we have dinner at Mos Burger but I have my dinner at home, therefore just accompany him for dinner. He treats me this strawberry ice-cream which i find it very innovative.

We walk around Far East Plaza for window-shopping. After that we head to DFS opposite. It is my first time to go inside and somehow is very singaporean-oriented. Themes such as Merlion,Orchid,Batik and other ethnic are everywhere at first level. Then at second level, it is more like a shopping centre.

I bumped into Kent. Been a long time since I met him last year. He is doing well as engineer at Tuas. He do some shopping too.

Brands are almost everywhere. I afraid I may just get addicted to having such expensive taste. Gucci, Prada, LV, burberry or even Adidas.

busy

I am so sorry for not updating my blog because there is certain period when one get busy and find blogging can be a waste of time activity. I realise that this habit I shall not abandon and leave my blog into full of cobwebs. Even my counter show the least human traffic this week. I need some available time to update my blog daily.

Today I attend bodycombat again. I bump into a very long lost friend in the class. I make mistake with her name. I call her Fiona but she correct me that she is Yvonne.I am so embarrased. Luckily she still recongize me when we both crossed our path. Now I have another female counterparts in the cali gym. I miss her wild girl antic. Anyway hope we will gym together.

After that, I leave early to avoid the peak crowd. I manage to catch up the last 2 episode of Charmed season 6 twice. I like the scene where Evil sisters meet Good sisters fight each other.

January is going to end yet I waste my time doing things so irrelevant.

Good Habit

Good habit needs to be instilled and continued. I have the habit of waking up late.

We are creatures of habit.
We have some good habits and some bad habits.
We are largely what we are because of the habits that we have.

Some of our habits have been developed carefully and  deliberately.
We have just drifted into others and adopted them without deliberation.

However, I force myself to wake up early as I promise to meet Kailing who will pass the M454 notes to me. I had my breakfast first. I meet Kailing outside CE office and we chat awhile before I leave the school to photocopy the notes at Nanyang Central. The auntie tells me that she can photocopy the whole set for only 10 minutes hence I reluctantly wait for her to do the task because I promise to meet Lincoln for shopping later. Anyway auntie is nice enough to complete it earlier than I expected and comment me that I look very tired upon seeing my tired eyes. How sweet of her! Smart to know I have not enough sleep.

I go back home and change and take my gym bag and take MRT to Orchard. I wait for Lincoln outside Pacific Plaza as he is at pet shop at Far East plaza. He asks me whether I want to share cost in buying the dis-entanglement lotion for fur for my cat and he needs it for his dog. Well, My cat is not going to attend any cat show plus the cat is going to leave me next month for new house hence spending a bomb on her is out of my priority. We have lunch at Cahaya restaurant at Far East S.C. I order oyster sauce chicken rice but it is not deemed unfit for consumption. Terrible. Lincoln orders his favourite dish, Laksa.

I meet two girls from my former JC. Scandalous.

We walk around Far East S.c and manage to buy two jeans , Not Levis but some unknown brand. I do not believe I de-grade myself to cheap jeans. Levis was apparently my all time favourite but I guess I have to try new variety.But still nothing can beat Levis Jeans. They are so authentic stuffs.

After that, we went to CK Tangs for window shopping when Lincoln meets his uncle by chance and they talk like nobody business.Hence I just do my own window-shopping.Then we go the level 1 to check out the M.A.C counter.Yes,we had fun asking for enquiries( silly ones) for certain types of make-up which male models usually purchased or used. Christopher Lee use their product.The lady is polite and friendly to answer our question. And I get myself free makeover.The lady help me to apply concealer and loose powder and voila, a smooth, flawless complexion under the magic of these product. I do not look like soem drag queen because no one can tell that i put on loose powder under naked eyes.Of course , people tend to look at us in some un believable manner.

Hence, putting on cosmetic does not undermine my masculinity, rather do what it takes to look my best.Apparently, we are selling ourselves no matter what business we're in. Nothing wrong with looking good and being a confident man. But of course, don't go until extreme like putting mascara or pink lipstick. Basic cosmetic like concealer, bronzing powder, loose powder and of course lip balm are sufficient.

Then we walk to Heeren to do some shopping. Fortunately, Lincoln manages to get his top at RE- shop.I even buy myself a green top at ID shop cost only $11.70 (after 70% off ). Good deal since it is a good brand.Then we walk back to Takashimaya to check out shoes/ bag at Bally. Apparently, the bag I like cost $1000++ and the shoes cost $600++. I do not that I have expensive taste. Lincoln suggests to go to Gucci boutique. I am not such a fan of these labels until I got a career and earn thousand then I will start to make visit to these boutique. I cannot deny that their product are gorgoues and lasting.

Then we walk to Cineleisure for our dinner at KFC restaurant. We have 8 treasure meal.We are like Paris-Nicole ( simple life 2 ) duo who enjoy fun and thrills we create. It will be called Complex life.Lame idea though.

Then we part after that. I suppose to meet Gabriel for weight-training session at Cali. But going to gym at peak hour is really like sardines squeezing in one can. It is super crowded and weight-training session seems to be in rush and short.We did chest and left early because Gabriel is so pissed off with his friend which I think is so redundant. I need a serious work-out because I am like a walking lard.

Boring Dayz

Today is actually my busy day but I do not attend the lecture for whole day because I am waiting for lincoln reply whether he is free to show the shop that sell cheap and nice jeans at Far East S.C but then he is being tied up with someone hence no shopping trip.

Because of that,I start to get lazy to attend the language class and once I do not attend this class, I will be not attending it for whole semester.Hence I just skip the class for ever.

Simple Life

I meet Lincoln at Jurong East MRT station and he is late again.I hate lateness and these people apparently do not understand that I hate lateness.I give that pissed-off look at him but it is short-lived because I do not want the whole day sulking over small matter.

We alight at Lavender Mrt station to go to Army Market at Beach Road. before shopping, Lincoln has his Katong Laksa as his late lunch.Then we walk around to look for the things I want.

Lincoln is amazed at the wide variety of things sold there, but he is not that keen to buy any of those because he says that most of product being sold there were rejected goods such as bad printing, messy seam or wrong printing and so on . After quality control, these products were sent to the non-boutique like those at Beach Road to be sold at lower price.He only goes for originality. I just roll eyes.

Apparently, I just buy thing that capture my attention. I do not believe in brands or labels but more to comfort and variety.I believe one does not need to wear branded clothes as long as one knows how to carry the clothes they wear well. Imagine one is wearing original LV shirt but people doubt the authencity of the brand, it can insulting to the wearer.I love clothes, hence more clothes, more happiness. I bought three tops , one of them is for gabriel's birthday present.There are nice selection of shoes at reasonable price. Now I know where to buy nice shoes. Plus, I am eyeing on the Puma brown jacket cost about $59.

We take a bus to Bugis Junction.We stop at Pet shop first before going to POA boutique.In POA, there are so many beautiful clothes but the price are damn steep.We do some window-shopping at Muji, Converse and Levis Store.Lincoln manages to buy the bow-shaped jean with scout logo behind at FreshBox store.

Then we decide to visit E-DON shop at North Bridge Raod by bus, when we realise that the shop is closed and that is so early. We walk towards Capitol Building to have our dinner.In-between, I buy some green peanut sesame cake and squid and crab nuggets at Old Chang Kee store. The lady is very sweet and friendly to me.

I have Mee Goreng and Lincolne has Dry Kway teow at Sakura restaurant.

We take bus to Orchard Road and pay a visit to Prada at Paragon. It is my first time entering such boutique. Lincoln wants to buy Prada dog leash for his dog. I just roll eye. Why spend so much on dog leash where he can buy 20 dog leash at pet shop. Is it the brand of just me? People inside look so arrogant and have i-got-money-so-better-treat-me-like-royalty look. Gosh, the sale assistants serve them like some kind of high-class slave. Don't tell me about customer service;It is more like losing dignity to serve such proud people.

I just can not stand those who ask for discount in Prada Boutique.Redundant!

We change our attire at Mandarin Hotel after a light snack at Mcdonald cafe outside Scotts SC and meet up with Lincoln's friend for clubbing.Apparently,he somehow get threatened by our appeareance, for being attractive. Hence he does not introduce his friend to us in case we may steal his limelight. Yawns!These selfish people are to be tortured by 5 doses of Slurpy Drink at 711 store. Give them some brain freeze and die.I have fun. I meet Lee Roy, one of the models there.

Life being a socialite is not that beautiful as anyone who picture them as ones.

Discovery

Today I decide to follow my parent to Johore Bahru. I go to Boon Lay to fetch my grandparents, but then my favourite grandauntie says that let my grandparent take her car but her daughter to follow me since my handphone does not have roaming service. I am not sure whether I am excited to drive to Johore Bahru even though it is my first time. There will be three cars to enter johore: Me, and my other grand uncles. I am in between as I follow one of my uncles and the car behind me just to assure my safety.

We enter second causeway and it is not much of traffic there but we spend quite on toll fee(less RM10 but two toll booths). Not only the road is rough and bumpy, the drivers there are like speedy gonzales with no traffic rules. It is quite normal and smooth ride despite my initial fear of driving in JB.It can be quite confusing to go to certain area without guide because Johore bahru is quite a big city.

First stop will be a visit to my other grandauntie's kampun house. She just bought the land of 1 lot and a house.I love rustic and peaceful kampung lifetsyle.It is like a chalet for them to have gathering away from Singapore. We have kampung lontong. My grandmum took some otah leaves.Me and Linda ( my cousin ) get to tour around with my auntie's sons.

Second stops will be several visits to many long relative, their house is much bigger because they bought hectare of land. And most of them are Singaporean.I heard from them it is cheap to buy land here and even build a house of own.

third stop will be a visit to medicine man at some kampung area and there is not parking area, hence two of use need toc ram into small area to aprk the car. We spend quite some times at his house. My mum need to ask for his consultation regarding her constant burping problem but is told that he is not expert in that field as he is more expertise in diabetes. He just recommend her to drink GAMAT water.

GAMAT is actually rare species of sea cucumbers. According to Prof. Dr. Ridwan Hashim of National University of Malaysia (UKM), one of the leading scientist in sea cucumber research stated that, sea cucumbers contain cell growth factor. The factor would stimulate new cell regeneration and at the fastest rate it is so efficient in treating wounds. Internal bleeding such as gastric and peptide ulcer could also be treated for it to cure.

Testimonials from his wifes by the clients such as maintaining youthful appearance and also improving the acne-prone complexion due to high contents of vitamin E.Help to cure diabetes and also high blood pressure. The only problem is its fishy smell.My mum ask me to smell the water she bought from them. It smells like filthy drain water. I get nauseated upon smelling it.

I go and observe the man (sort of) healing my grandmum's leg. Diabetics often have circulatory problems that can cause blood to pool in their lower extremities. If one suffer from diabetes,he/she should inspect the feet daily for reddened areas, blisters, abrasions, and lacerations, especially if one foot is no longer sensitive to stimulation. The incidence of gangrene of the feet, which can be caused by decreased blood flow and neurological disease resulting from diabetes, is 20 times higher in diabetics than in those without the disease. Since foot injuries can easily result when there is a lack of sensitivity in the feet. When i see my uncle's leg full with black spot, it is really gross site.

The man actually use certain flour with somethingh which I am not sure. Anyway, it is their healing secret, the rest is all depend on God's will.He doughing that flour all over my grandmun's leg for several minutes.After that, his wife takes that flour and then separates into two and search for something with help of candle's light. She says that there is two germs inside the flour.I am quite skeptical with this kind of traditional healing.

I go n observe the flour and it is true to see the germs or actually it looks like a worm with size of hair strand , wiggling inside the flour.It is really astonishing to see such discovery. These germs are actually the ones who keep eating the flesh of diabetics hence there is no wonder why diabetics foot are usually amputated to prevent the spread of the germs to whole body system. I learnt a lot from him, even though I am not diabetic and non-medical expert. It is better to stay prevented than being cured.

One more thing I learn that he usually select those vegetables with a lot of holes indicated that those have been feed by the worms instead of those fresh, full vegetables. According to him, those vegetables with many holes do not contain any harmful chemical unlike those fresh loooking vegetables because those worms will never touch or feed those vegetables with pesticide or harmful chemical sited on or inside the leaves. It is like we are feasting on the harmful chemical when we select those vegetables. It does make sense actually. Actually we are eating poison, and we do not realise about it.

Then, last stop will be my favourite grandauntie's house or villa at Gelang patah. the security is so strict. Her house is more like a high-class chalet with bigger space. We reach there late or else I will go for horse-riding session.

Johore chalet

After that, we all have a dinner nearby together and buy some local delicacies before going back to Singapore.I sent my grandparents back home and reached hom at 10pm.

I do not attend Gabriel birthday at Pasir Ris chalet today because my sister and her hubby will be using the car to go and stay at her in-laws.Sighs!

Language

I am so fickle-minded whether I shall attend LC80 class since I do not manage to register the class ebcause of my sufficient AUs.

I walk to and fro in front of class, in dilemma to attend it. But i muster my courage and just enter and sit behind.

I learn new thing about tones,apparentky I seems to know most of the words but I do not want to show off in class. The teacher is kind and pateint enough to correct my oral capability to pronounce the tones and words. I am quite shy actually.

Fatigue

I did not sleep much today - 2 hours to be exact. I was so lazy to go to wet market to buy groceries, hence I just continue to sleep again but constantly disturbed by my cat's loud mewing. I cannot be bothered to cater to its needs. Then at 12noon, I chang and go shopping at Prime supermarket to buy groceries. today I am going to cook fried Chilli tempe, Green Curry chicken,Steamed kailan with oyster sauce and fried tofu. I enjoy cooking. I spend around $30 to cook such dishes. As usual, there are mistake I learnt during cooking session. For green curry, I put too much water, hence the gravy was not thick but watery. nevertheless, I enjoy my lunch and maybe my sister too.

Then I rest awhile before travelling to cali fitness center at Orhard Raod. I feel a little bit lazy to go.

I miss yoga class. Hence I do the cross trainer for 30minutes, then do some chest presses and back presses. Today I am going to major muscle work-out. A lot of amiliar faces in the gym.Striking conversation seemed to outweigh my weigh training session. Everyone seems surpised to see me at california gym again.Yeah, I feel so loved.Bleah.Anyway It was a short session but I do not take a bath because I did not sweat much today. I go to Cheers at cineleisure to buy 90c chicken paos and take a bus to clementi bus interchange.I bump into old friend, Ronnie

Ronnie is a nice guy but due to egoistic and bossy attitude, I lost a good friend like him. I felt guilty everytime we bump each other. I fall out with him over small matters which I find it stupid and immature.Ok, enough said.

Then I watch tiger cup on TVmobile. Apparently, The lions team is going to win. The score is like 2-0 ( versus Indonesia ). I read someoen blog to why the Indonesian ahd anticipated the loss. Currently, Indonesians had faced a tsunami wave disaster and there is no wonder why they look like they are mourning at National Stadium.And Singaporeans are not sensitive enough towards Indonesian by doing Kallang waves everytime, cause distraction for the indonesian players to ecall the aftermath. Kallag waves. Waves is so tabooish.

Today I suppose to do the contact list but my imac seem to crash microsoft application like MS Word.hence I have to do the work at school. But i sleep late but need to wake up early

Birthday Again

Today i decide to open the parcel airmailed by Kailing and Hung Yong. It is like celebrating my birthday again today. And these people really understand what I like much - something fashionable. They bought for me an army green pouch and cute koala bear wrist rest which glows at night. Fascinating. I really love the gift so much that I am almost in tears. Very dramatic but I never encounter such beautiful ad sweet moment before. Ok, beside lily birthday brownie surpise. I love surpises. Thanks Kailing and Hung yong for the wonderful presents. Something useful yet trendy

Today I spend whole day sleeping, recuperating my muscle ache. It is nice to stay at home on weekend.

Around 7pm, Derek called me if I am keen to go out and meet him and maybe to go clubbing. I agree because I have enough sleep. I meet him at Jurong West st 42 near his house for dinner but I have mine at home. I just accompany him to have dinner. There is rowdy guy , making a din at coffeehouse. One shall know that he is drunk and dumb. I am anticipating some ugly fight to be happened but there isn't.This area are known for such manners.

I wait under the void deck as Derek goes back to change. 15 minutes up. Another 15 minutes up. Another 15 minutes up almost. And I have to wait for a guy for more than 1/2 hours. That is so ridiculous. I am fuming with anger and almost like going home straight away.I hate super lateness.If I wait for a guy from more than 10 minutes, I just leave and meet me somewhere. I am so angry with him but then because of my anger management, I tell him that this will be last time I tolerate lateness from him. He somehow gets the point.

We takes MRT to club. Luckily for me, We both manage to get the club free as Derek know the bouncer.I enjoys every minutes and attentions in the club as if I am celebrating my birthday again.Welcome back, socialite esjay.

Kinsey

I meet Aziz, my best friend on the way home. He is with his friend. We do strike conversation as per normal but the feeling seems quite different and little distant. Maybe he is with his friend hence he has to hold back himself being silly and fun with me. I just feel like losing a friend somehow.

I go to california gym for bodycombat and bodypump in afternoon. My first attempt to attend bodypump and i am quite embarrased that I can not carry heavy weights , instead the weight I have is similar to the auntie's beside me. How weak i am. I need more muscle conditioning. Bodypump is the fastest way to tone and condition body and get in shape! This is a barbell class set to awesome music while one is motivated by the instructor to push one to his/her limit! Non-impact and moderate to high intensity work out. I realise that I have weak muscle despite having muscles.

After that I go and meet Lincoln for movie at Lido theater.The movie we watch is Kinsey: Let's talk about sex; and it is midnight show. Lincoln is being stopped by the uncle to check his NRIC because the movie is restricted to 21 years old patrons. The theater is surpisingly empty with few people. Lido 2 is such a big theater though.

Life story of Alfred Kinsey, a man driven to uncover the most private secrets of the nation, and a journey into the mystery of human behavior. In 1948 Kinsey irrevocably changed American culture and created a media sensation with his book "Sexual Behavior in the Human Male". Using the technique of his own famous sex interviews, story recounts the scientist's extraordinary journey from obscurity to global fame.

Watching this movie is like attending a sex education but the setting is 50s era.There are numerous pervasive sexual content, including some graphic images and descriptions like female and male frontal nudity and some kinky scene which degrade women dignity and social/moral values. Kinsey enlightens some controversial subjects related to male sexuality like homosexuality and adultery.Adultery is acceptable at home and homosexuality is male growing up experience. Nevetherless, the movie do touch on the love and affection of Mr and Mrs Kinsey which grow stronger when they grow older. If you notice , everyone except Kinsey grows older and haggard.

Then we take a cab to go clubbing. It is a waste of time actually because the show end at 2+ am. Today I spend so much money on things that is unnecessary.

official member

I go and apply california gym membership today. I meet Robert and manage to get the good offer deal for membership. Yes, I am official member of CFC.

I go out and have a good meal at Cuppage Center because I am still deciding whether I shall go for gym session. maybe I go for cardio session but then I pay for the padlock that cost me $5. I am not in the mood for anyhting today , hence I just go back home early.

lazy at home

Today is an early day. I go to Gek Poh Ville to buy my favorite $1.20 Nasi Lemak and a packet of soy drink, as well as Straitstime newspaper. There is one job offer at Spinelli which I am interested in but I have no time to go out.

I spend whole day at home again.

Wait, I go to Jurong point Library to return the book and borrow some book on low-fat recipes. Then I go to Popular Bookstore to buy a thai cookbook cost me about $14.90. Then I go back home , watching TV with my mum. I explain my mum that the house need a facelift and I suggest to paint whole house in red and my mum, being conservative, against the idea. Damn it. I just hate to threaten her about moving out and have house of my own. I guess she does not buy it as she know me well.

Then I spend whole evening to watch TV . I manage to catch last episode of Double Happiness. Plus today I am excited to hear that new season Charmed start tonight plus another male version of American Top Model : Manhunt. I am so excited ( with my head swing behind) ala Yoanna. Cringed.

I still need to do the work being tasked by Rachel but i need to sort out the notes for my school as well as Dave. i owe him big time in helping me. Nothing much to brag about tonite except I'm in dilemma whether I shall go Bangkok on Chinese New Year.

A date with rachel

I do not go to school today because I wake up at 1.40pm. However I receive 3 missed calls and messages from Derek and Rachel. I go to town around 2pm by MRT. I bump into Andy, Kent's friend on mrt. We do have some conversation and now he work under bank I am not sure of. I stop at Clementi and take bus 7 to YMCA McDonalds. I have milo while reading the article I brought erlier for leisure reading for my gym blog. Anyway the new beef burger looks very appertizing but I am going to have dinner later with Rachel.I receive a call from NTU regarding my successful registration except general elective. I need to meet the subject coordinator for registration. I make a call to Peter from California Fitness Center regarding the membership at CFC. There will be promotion again this thursday.Hence , I have to go there on Thursday again to check the lowest deal he manage to get.

I walk to Raffles City for window-shopping session. Another waste of time activity.

I walk back to Capitol and take a bus 167 to Isetan Scotts. I notice this fabulous Adidas red and black jacket at Adidas Boutique at Pacific Plaza. I guess it must be very expensive.I kill time by window-shopping around Far East Plaza while waiting for arrival of Rachel. Apparently, window- shopping is very depressing activity for me because I get work-up when I see so many things or clothes I want to buy but just cannot. And I need a serious clothes makeover, despite my own makeover.I go CK Tangs to check out the sport shoes at Men's level. I see Steven Lim , eyebrow plucker ( which I guess, looking for some lady customer for eyebrow shaping ).Do not wish to comment much about him.

I meet Wyman, former JC classmate. I have to put with his disgusting antics. Turn off.
Wyman: Hey Esjay
Esjay: Hey, sorry I do not notice you, busy smsing.What you doing here?
Wyman: I'm going to buy some stuffs?
Esjay: You look bigger than before
Wyman: Yeah, I am big, everywhere big. My dick is also big.
Esjay roll eyes with disgusting look
Wyman: How's your gay partner, Aziz?
Esjay: HUH? HE IS MARRIED AND WE ARE NOT GAY PARTNER. DUH!
Wyman: Yeah lah, but never contact him.
Esjay: I did lah, he got one son now. I need to go now
Wyman: Ok, I am now at NUS
Esjay: I know, I have your namecard
Wyman: Why never contact?
Esjay: One day. Bye

What's wrong with him nowadays?

I meet Rachel outside KFC and then recommend her to have dinner at Esteller77. We both have chicken meal set cost about $5.50 and fried fish otak-otak. We have fun talking and laughing about people we know. Then after meal, she is giving a job , somehow a partnership with her: Account services. Apparently, I am more like under her and i do mind helping her and get money at the same time. It's freelance. She explain to me the corporate thingy and jobscope of Account Executive. Urchapter is actually advertising company, whose one of the major works is Yum Cha restaurant adverstiment. We discuss about the jupmstart of the job that has been delayed. I am quite excited about it but I wish to stay low-profile until we clinch one deal. now I need to search for list of the various portfolio to contact. Plus, I feel bad when Rachel pay for the meal despite I insist on paying.

We go shopping for a while around Far East Plaza. Then we walk to Pacific Plaza as Rachel wants to check out the boots there. Coincidently, I also want to check out the jacket. She loves the winter boots which cost $269 roughly. It is nice and thick but quite expensive. Similarly, the jacket is nice but it COSTs $169. Where can i get such amount to buy that jacket.Depressing. Bitch Fit. Then we made a visit to That CD shop. The salegirl is so nice and friendly . Plus sweet enough to let us try out quite a number of CD displays. rachel tells me that Blue Bat CD is Fabulous and it is true. I know I am sucker for jazz but this kind of lounge jazz: groovy yet relaxing for the type I am looking for. It cost $81.90. Gee! I do not know I have passion for expensive stuffs. I skip the idea of buying at the moment. We try out other CDs but nothing beats The Blue Bar CD. I manage to get High Society' jazzamor while Rachel gets herself Milano Fashion CDs.

Then we part our own way. I manage to get home aorund 11pm.

LAzy

I spent my entire Sunday at home

Chill-out lounge

I am disturbed by the phonecall by Lincoln in the morning. He calls me just to tell me his experience with the dead maid just now.It is his second encounter to face dead bodies in the scene of crime. This Indonesian maid, which is coincidently is his supervisor's , literally tried to escape by tying several clothes to make a long rope from fifth storey to climb down. Apparently, the plan was foiled somehow, hence she fell to death. Luckily for him, the body was intact. No body parts flew all over. After that, he ask me what my plan is . I just can not think much after I just woke up. Mind's blank.

I receive a sms from lily if I am interested to her to go shopping later at Suntec. I do not mind since I need to buy shoes and bag for official school reopening on monday. I am late as usual because I am updating my playlist in the MP3 player. When i reach suntec exhibition hall 402, big blue plastic bag is given to me and I am not aware that it is NLB book sales. The place is crowded with parents and children. Children are everywhere, and they give me headaches.I manage to locate Lily who is busy digging the books on the gondola. Apparently, she manage to get the books she wants but still searching for her mother. Hence, I go and browse around, hopefully I manage to get some cookbook and self-motivation books. Mostly ,there are computer books and travel books. Apparenly, most of them were outdated. I manage to get 5 books after an hour of digging for books at various gondola. I even try to serach for some bodybuilding magazines and magazine section. 1 pack cost only $5.

Then lily manage to get 11 books and there is alot. Anyway, she loves reading, but not me. I am more into self-help book. Non-fiction. The five books I manage to get are:

1) Trends: Interior design
2) 50 ways to train your cat
3) Applying for job
4) How to find happiness
5) Adventure traveller guide
plus 10 magazine of interior design, hence total cost of $15 Only ( Each book cost $2 and I packet of magazines cost $5)

After that, I am so clumsy when carrying the magazine because it is damn heavy and bulky. Travelling from suntec city to city hall, and walk through the crowd is really torment. Then we took bus to California Center. I need to ask enquiries regarding the membership. lily is sweet enough to accompany me when we meet Peter. I see Brent outside CFC and he is like so fair and effeminate. What a drastic change after he becomes a model. Anyway there is not promotion anymore and what is being offered is too expensive. Where can I get such large amount of money. When I calculate it, It is considered cheap enough to get such rate since Peter is nice enough to help me get good deal. I feel so welcomed. I tell him that I will meet him on Monday to clinch the deal. After that, I decide to go home since it is raining heavily and I carry such bulky stuff; I guess I cancel my shopping plan.

I reach home at 6pm and feeling hungry. I am so pissed when I realise there is not cooked rice in the cooker. I cook the rice by myself and leave myself hungry. The only way is to take a nap. Then my mum wake me up to tell me that I can eat my dinner now. My mum cooked my favourite dish today:Soy and chilli Chicken ( i do not know how to interprete the name) .

I receive a call from derek asking me to watch movie at Jurong Point. We suppose to meet at 9pm but i went earlier to buy the ticket. We are watching Meet the Fockers movie.I spend my time window-shopping in Jurong Point until derek asks me to meet him at Sembawang music store. I buy Jazz CD: Jane Sieder for $20.90. Well, there is time when there is transition during the our life span, eventually my taste for music change from techno to trance to oldies to RnB and jazz. I tend to listen soothing and mushy music mostly. Derek buy some music for his yoga class.

The movie is so hilarious. Almost everyone in the theater was laughing at the funny antics. I guess it is worth spending for such movies. Dustin Hoffman and Barbara Streisand are really a interesting couple in the show and i think they act quite good as fockers.Plus that dog and the Persian cat. Totally gross and disgustingly good.

Then we take a cab to Phoenix Road to meet Lincoln. We have our supper at nearby coffeshop before we walk up the long slope to his apartment. We chill out at Lincoln's apartment. We have fun surfing net, gossiping, bitching about our common friend, A, Listening to music and telling ghost stories.His dog, in spite very cute creature, can be very irritating at times. I am afraid of her. And her name is Princess and I am like...... speechless.I know what to buy for her birthday: Tiara crown.

Lincoln: The term friendship , according to A has different meaning. When you are useful during the moment, he will stick to you and be you friend but once, he find you no longer in use, he will dump you and find other useful friend.
Derek: That sounds like condom. Use it and after that, discard it away
Me: I was the used condom.
Everyone laughed

We chill out till 4am and then Derek and I go back home by cab. Nevertheless, At least it is nice to hang out with friends than to go clubbing on saturday. It will be quiet and simple affair. I go and sleep.

School sucks

Today, I go to school at 7.30am and that is early for me. I go to library to do registration for my subject and apparently, I just cannot get the ideal timetable I plan earlier. I met Madalaine Goh for some enquiries that I am allowed to take part-time subject as I am still a graduating student and I have to fill two form: Pink and Green for overloading and problems I face.Hence, this procedure take me whole morning and it really drain my mental energy. I am not at the acceptable scale of style. I manage to register 3 subjects and wait for the outcome next week. I go to my locker and realise that my bag i left inside has turn mouldy. Yes those whitish mould cover the whole bag that it is unfit for use. I just dump it into the dustbin.

I go to canteen B to buy my lunch and go back home and eat.

Nothing much today. Short entry. Happy weekend.

Laze at school

My birthday party is OFFICIALLY cancelled.

My friend says that there is no point or need to splurge money to organise big party. I do not work and my income is like unpredictable hence it will be nice to just save for raining days. Apparently I spend whole day thinking about it. It's true. Worse, it is last minute preparation and sure there will be a lot of commotion and hiccups before and during the party. Therefore I decide to call off the idea of having party.

Surpisingly, I make a good decision to stay at home to finish the unattended tasks like continue cleaning my room, sorting my notes, creating the gym blog and reading some motivation articles. Doing spring cleaning in my room needs a lot of patience and perseverance. It reminds me of Banda Aceh during Tsunami aftermath.Once I have done my cleaning, my cat start to enter my room and give a purr agreement that the place is fit for both of us. She is so smart.

I realise that my blog entries are getting longer and long-winded but I ' m loving it. It will be bonus if I can manage to get cameraphone or digital camera to make my diary more general rather than focus on myself. It can be boring sometimes.I believe picture speak thousand words.Period.

Anyway I do not go to Johore Bahru to have my haircut because it is really total waste of time traveling. Especially for my age, time is very precious and important. Sometimes it is nice to hang out with people with larger perceptives and far-sight than hang out with good-looking stupid people AKA Bimbos/Himbos (and they are not blonde).

Time to look for article for my weightloss/gain muscle program.Surf and Sweat is coming soon.

Nobody Knows

I woke up late as usual. This habit shall be changed to better one. Today I went to accompany my mum to Jurong East Polyclinic for her consistent ailment who irks her everyday: Constant Burping. I hate going to polyclinic because I always associate polyclinic with waste of time. Waste time waiting for registration, waste time waiting for consultation and waste time for medication collection. It is all just because of the cheap consultation fee. I am always been a good son, and today i feel ashamed of myself when I ask my mum for money again. I feel like a good-for-nothing. I know the reason why my mum do not want to give me $1K for my california gym membership and digital camera.She wants me to know that hard-earned money is not easy to obtain. I shall not be free-loader eventually.

After that, we go in separate way. I take bus 197 from Jurong East Interchange to Raffles Place. From there, I took mrt to Marina Bay. It is still early hence I take this route. It is my first time to alight from Marina Bay MRT station. The place is very windy and peaceful. I manage to watch the two kites flying in the sky. I feel like I am a kite: Despite being able to fly high and above freely, I am still bounded by the string . There are quite numbers of joggers there. LC reach later and inform me that will I be intereted in eating seafood despite having pork as one of serving. The answer is obvious NO. He bring up the issue regarding usage of utensil and plates/bowls when I did the cooking at AL's house. I was not aware and ignorant about it until my mum told me about it. Hence, I tell him that I will skip the steamboat buffet , hence he suggest having satay at Satay Club. I agree with the idea.

The satay club brings a lot of memories , especially relating to best friends. My good friends and I always came here to enjoy satay together. When I look around me, I recall the past,I usually find that it is the simplest things - not the great occasions - that in retrospect give off the greatest glow of happiness, such as laughter and fun. These things were free.Strangely, I could remember so much in detail that time. We order 5 sticks of chicken heart, 5 sticks of chicken meats, 5 sticks of beef meats and 5 sticks of muttons. The meats which we want to try but out of stock are ducks and ostrich. LC orders wanton mee while I order Sliced fish bee hoon. It is another first time to eat such healthy food. I just feel weird without any chilies in the food. Hence I took two dish of chili padi and add to the soup. Yes I know it will be going to be super hot one but I just love the thrill of having such hot stuff. We chat while digesting the food we order. We are like so full that we do not even finish the satay. Such a waste!

We suppose to meet Rachel in town but then LC feels like watching movie later. We take MRT to Somerset and check out the movie screening. The queue is very long but LC tell me the other way to buy tickets in fast and short way: Go near the acfe and buy the tickets at the counter where they sell popcorns and other refreshment. We are going to watch Nobody Knows. a Japanese movie. He said that the rating is very good by several critic, even Quetin tarantino.Truthfully, going for movie is not my liking beside karaoke. I seriously do not bother about wide screen and splendid sound surround system but I find it watching movie about spending 2 or more hours cramping oneself on the less spacious seat and silence is much appreciated. We walk around the cineleisure to pass time before proceeding to cinema at level 4. Now I know cinema 7,8 and 9 situated at level 4.

Nobody Knows movie is Totally D boring movie I have watched. It is about 4 kids being left by their irresponsible and selfsih mum who marry to someone at Osaka. Hence, she leave the eldest brother, Akira who is only 12 year old to take care of his three siblings. The japanese movies are always known for playing with your emotions with real life events( which is related to anyone ). It is touching and sad movie but somehow boring one for me. I do not shed tears. Even LC who is much more emotinal find it hard to shed any tears. Home run( local production directed by Jack Neo) is much better than Nobody Knows. If you are into arty-farty movie which star young kids, watch Nobody Knows. I am not peodophile, anyway although the japanese school uniform depicts sexiness.

It end at 12am and waiting for the last bus was the most stupid thing to do. We wasted 15 minutes, expecting the 174 or 190 bus to come. While waiting, I saw this manager who works at TCC cafe beside Papa Joe who apparently still recognise me. I just reply him with smile.Anyway, we decide to take taxi home.

Job Top-less

I went to community library to return book and also borrow some books too, trying to inculcate some interest in reading novel.I give up eventually. I took a bus 174 to town. Dzul come and approach me while I am waiting for the bus. I read all the books during the journey. I had my late lunch: Hainanese Chicken Rice at Lucky Plaza. Then I walked to library at Taka S.C. to return the book and also borrow new sets of book.

Before that, i received a sms from Esther regarding the job this saturday and a missed call from Ming Hui. I am quite surpised to receive a call from him. I call him and ask me regarding the job offer this sat which I have not yet call Esther yet. He told me that we are required to go topless for 4hours in town. It because it is wakeboarding competition hence they need three guys to go topless with bermuda which resembles beach boys and the three girls in bikini tops and shorts. He might consider first and decide to call me first. How sweet!

Being topless in town, carrying a wakeboard for 4 hours; I am not that keen because I do not have good bods to show and I am quite far, far from being beach boy. I call esther and she explain to me regarding the job requirement but i am reconsidering about the offer because Kailing must have forget to tell me the requirement. Anyway, she is very patient and friendly enough to listen to my side of story. Unless, we wear singlet , I guess we have to reject the offer. Ming hui does say that it is not worth doing it plus, he do not dare to do such assignment. Hearing this from someone whose bod is yummilicous put me into shame. He has such principled character. I tell Esther that I will try to help her to find replacement for me and get back to her soon. I call LC to help me, and even sms ANYD and Lily to help me scout for those interested in doing such assignment. LC get one (whom he claim he looks like Won Bin) for me but when he know that he has to go topless, he reconsider it. Lily tells me that the assignment is quite cheap. ANYD does not even bother to reply

Eventually, I go back home to extend my help again through MSN and ICQ. Despite to sacrifice my principle, I messaged ANYD to help me find any or he is interested to do for me. I know the answer all along that he will not help me but I just want to try my luck. Instead,he ask me where I get such offer? I tell him that that is not the point where I get such assignment, but the most important that will he help me? I guess that piss him off. And there I do not get the answer. There are always issues between us, He often try to boost his ego and self-esteem at times which seriously make other find amusing and just laugh at his antic of trying to impress hard. To him, I am just snobbish and egoistic bastard with no high socialite status. I just do not like constant showing-off.

Rachel and I messaged each other through ICQ till 3am. She is nice enough to help me find the good location for the birthday party. One she can get for me is at Farrer Road, although she is quite embarrased to ask her student for permission to use the premise at Tanglin Road. People like Rachel are really hard to find and I am lucky to know her. She did help me much and offer to help without asking is one of the virtue which is really lack in Singaporeans. Or maybe, I just hang out with wrong people. There are people who do help me without hesitation. I am just pissed off that this person will not even want to help me much. I will not care less anyway. I get the feeling I may postpone the birthday bash. Plus I need to break bad news to Esther.

Start of school

I went to school after watching Debbie facelift. I promised to meet Kailing aat school before 2.30pm. I hated going to school actually because I am having bad hair day.Luckily, someone had invented a cap. The library 1 is very crowded as usual. I was lucky enough to get the computer from Kailing who is going for a lesson later at 2.30pm. She was telling me about her final year project which she manage to finish the draft. It is quite fast to clear the draft at this time or maybe I am just being slow to submit my draft. After she left, I go to register my subjects which apparently most of them ( the ones I had already planned earlier ) have no vacancy. Hence I need to print out the ideal timetable so that I can ask the request from teh MPE office to put me inside. There is a serious long queue at printing room and pluse there is jam at printers area which these people have no patience to wait for the release of lecture notes but to print on their own. Hence imagine one student prints about 20 pdf files ( Let's not talk about number of pages in each pdf file ) and other 20 students follow suit. It will waste my time waiting since I only print like one page ONLY. I give up and leave the library to canteen B for my super late lunch.

While waiting for bus and reading the Chronicle, I caught a glimpse of a person behind who look very familiar but it is just a short glance until the shuttle bus come. I look at him and he acknowlede me and say that he do not recognize me from the back. It is Ming Hui. Yes, I also cannot recognize him at all. His sense of dressing , and bag and his hair. yes, his wavy blonde hair remind me of some japanese teen hearthrob.I was quite shocked with his sudden new image. I think I shall do the same, making a drastic makeover before the school reopen. But I look fat.And I need to run.

I went to Yio Chu Kang stadium to run because it is always raining at western part of Singapore. I manage to reach there at 5.30pm and start to run round the tracks for 8 times after changing to running attire. I forget to eat my hydroxycut capsules. The sun start to come up and it ray of light shine against my skin. Hence, I decide to stop running at 8th round and proceed to pool for a quick swim. Then, I alight at Ang Mo Kio central to have my dinner at KFC restaurant. This girl at counter is nice enough to give me medium sized Sarsi drink as there is not stock of regular cups. I appreaciate her generosity but those drink add more empty calories to my diet and running just now is just an futile attempt to lose weight. Where is my disciplne? How to achieve my resolution if I keep tempted with such sinful food? After that, I doze off in the bus , all the way to Boon lay.

At home, I am planning to have birthday celebration this week which will be held on either at Gallery hotel or Somebody house. I even finish creating the invitation phamplet for the guests. However, I afraid that it will be a last minute preparation. Anyway, my mum ask me about my result. I know she is disappointed with me and I know I am disappointed with myself. Behind any failure,there are always a good reasons or excuses . I am 28 year old guy who achieve nothing. Such a useless bum! Time to wake up!

Happy Birthday 28th

What a not good day to start my celebration. It was raining non-stop since morning. It made me feel lazy to call everyone and desperately asked anyone to celebrate my birthday with me. The word is DESPERATE. Luckily, Lily call me to go out and do some shopping with her on this cool day. I meet lily at Kinokuniya Bookstore and I was late as usual. Luckily for her, she have books to spend time waiting for me. Then We have late lunch and I am suggesting to have korean food at ZingDo/Breeks restaurant at 5th level. On the escalator, Lily give a peek on my cheek and present me with an extraordinary gift( as usual). I was shocked to accept tortoise as a birthday gift and that was some kind of special if I want to put this way.

Then I treated lily lunch hence I order a fish and chip meal and kimchi chicken rice ( I think so) for both of us. I enjoyed the Kimchi Chicken Rice as it was hot and spicy.We chatted a while while enjoying the meal. Lily talked about her working experience at Sentosa Countdown two days ago.I am also telling her about my birthday celebration. After meak, we went to Bodyshop and also Watson's shop as Lily wants to buy some stuff . Apparently, there are so many discounted items at Watson's Shop. One of the items that catches my eyes is the facial massager cost only $10. I am so into anti-ageing equipments and products. Then we braved our way to Wheelock Place , thanks to lily's pink umbrella. I could not find the place which Hall 14 investiture was used to hold there. I think it is a good place to hold the birthday celebration. After futile attempt, we went to Borders bookstore. I bump into Andy who apparently supposes to meet me tonight. Seriously I am like so thick-skinned to inform the people i know that today is my birthday. I am such desperado.

I meet some LJers at Borders.At least I meet these up close and personal. However, I am too shy to approach them and say to them that I read their daily journals. It sounds cheap rather. I bought myself this LookbookMen whose front cover model is Utt. I simply loves his hairstyle and at least I have some material to show to the hairdresser to cut the same way as Utt . I am just Utt wannabe and I am proud to admit it. Yes, I am shocked with Lily's complusive spending on books. She bought about 4 books in one shot and each of them is like quite thick. I always think reading is a waste of (past)time, and makes a contribution to obtain bad and even failed results in English. Yes, One mistake to enter Junior College with weak foundation in English and I was not interested in English subject at all. No point, dwelling on the past. Back to lily's spending on books, she choose those books which may somehow related to her living experience like love and social life. I just try to make more keen to invest time and money on book but I could not. I stick to magazines. I am telling her that one day she should write a book based on her life expereicne and that is where online journal/diary comes in useful. I am going to write a book about myself entitled: Painted faces. Just another dream to fulfil.I guess we're just made of dream.Nothing else matters as long as we believe that dreams are for real.

Then we went to Borders cafe.Lily excused herself to ladies while I had difficulty to choose drinks cheaper than $5. Then I saw this waitress with a cake with a candle heading forward to the main cafe. I am lookinga round and wondering who shares the same birthday as me. In one moment, she comes to my table and put in on the table, coincidently Lily is just in time when the cake arrives. The cake is brownies and the size is big. I am damn to maximum touched with lily's gesture to buy my favouritie items: Brownies with a candle. I am nearly moved to tears because I felt honoured. The moment is seriuosly priceless . Too bad I did not have digital camera to show the happiness in my face. Thanks Lily for everything. It has been my wish for years to have anyone or everyone in big group to present my favourite brownies with candles and sing a birthday song to me because I have not experience that before. Anyway I blew the candle after making wish that I would stay younger as ever. I know it is kind of narcisstic but hey that is my birthday wish. I have 3/4 of brownies which I still cannot finish it all. It is much sweeter and thicker than those at Indulge. It is still brownies and I simply love it. If you want me to like you, buy me brownies.

We saw Remy with three gorgoues girls, just outside the border cafe. We chatted a lot and the atmosphere has been similar to those at Sex And The City. Good friends are enjoying each other company at cafe while having teas., with addition of bitching session amongst one another and Others. It was beautiful but expensive. Then we walked to MRT to go home since Lily wants to watch Ocean Eleven.

Then while playing with my new pet, tortoise, I got a call from LC to apologise to me regarding on New Year Eve. I tell him that there is nothing for me to get angry for because no point being petty and demand everyone to bid what I say if other party just simply can not make it to enjoy the celebration together.My resolution is to be more nicer person. He ask me out to have birthday celebration in different ways. Since It was early and in the mood for another celebration, I drive to his apartment and wait awhile for him since he just back from his working shift. We go to Orchard Road and I park my car opposite Youth park. LC tells me that there is a private party organised by some high flier in Media Industry at IndoChine, according to ANYD and he is keen to check it out.I am not that keen actually to really be part of those people but we wait at Mcdonald cafe at Scotts plaza for while and enjoy the French Fries.At 12 am, there is not sight of people queueing for the party and then we decide to go to this pub named Happy Bar at Tanjong pagar. I am surpised that there is no cover charge tonight and that save me from paying both of us the entry charge. It is my virgin time and apparently it is very crowded with men. Seriously, the place is like a walking men fashion magazine. People dress up to nines and I could get the ideas of what to wear when school re-open. Chilling out with gays is really adventurous experience. There are so many people from Media and fashion industry. I just come and just to enjoy and dance all night long to the house music. It has been a while i stay away from clubbing scene. I managed to get birthday greeting accompanied with hugs from people I knew from fashion industry. Yes, I danced with LC together with these beautiful men on my birthday. LC dares me to do ridiculous and fun things with these people. Sorry that I disappoint him and maybe the readers. I am always acting aloof at times.

Then LC and I ahve supper at maxwell market before I send him back home. My only disappointment that I do not manage to celebrate my birthday with Bee Lan, Hui Hui and Hung Yong inspite I celebrate my birthday with three different people at different occasion. I thank everyone who did remember my birthday by sms or message through ICQ. I just hope my birthday wish come true because I am really a proscratinator of time and I should be more disciplined in achieveing my goals. I am grateful to God for giving me another chance to live longer to continue devoting to Him and living my life of own.

The league of my own.

Happy New Year

It is still rainng and I am on the maximum comfort in my room - it is good time to foster both reflection and optimism Traditionally, this is a time for New Year’s resolutions (looking ahead) and also a time for reflection on how good God has been to me this past year.How has that blessing been manifested in my life this past year?  What has entered my life this year that I am grateful for?

However seeing past events from and out of time perspective make it easier to evaluate how specific events had either caused grief or sorrow or brought joy, and maybe personal growth and memories of love and friendship to be remembered far into future.There is tendency to focus on the unexpected hurdles that seem to pop up just when things are starting to go the way they want them to. I guessed most important is to accept openly to the challenges of life, whether it is positive or negative.Hence today may be a good direction for change and resolve to enhance life by furthering mind, body and spirit to lead more rewarding and full life, rather than empty and superficial life. I realised that when i read through my archives. I realised the importance of having online diary.

My Resolutions of 2004
1) Pass , not score , my subjects
2) Get my body back to hunky shape
3) Earn money at least $600
4) Get closer to God
5) Find Hang-out Buddies

None of them I achieved.The problem is that my goals were so rigid that reaching the goal creates stress by either becoming a full time job, or leaving me with a feeling of failure for having one piece of cake. I was not that reactive in reaching my dreams.Maybe I should put more flexibility to goal-setting .Be kind to myself when I design any action plan and add changes to my life that will bring joy and fulfillment during the change process.Afterall life is not about being perfect and the world is a permenant place to stay.

My resolution for 2005 , but I will evaluate on July 1st 2005 to see how far I am very active in fulfilling my resolution.

1.Clear all my subjects BY THIS SEMESTER.
2. Get a tanned, ripped body
3. Decorate the house into place of renaissance
4. Be more religious
5. Get a job in service line to get some ample experience
6. Save money to open foodstall
7. Widen my social circle hence bigger networking
8. Speak one more language
9. Be more adventurous

I will slowly turn this resolution into workable projects and with the help of God's blessing and my determination, I CAN achieve my dreams in half month.

Recap of the timeline in 2004
JANUARY
1. Highest Rainfall
2. The Start of American Idol show
3. The wedding of my body-building buddy, Herwan
4. Worst tan lead to peeling and burn
5. Approval of FYP

FEBRUARY
1. Bee Lan Bday Celebration@Sanur
2. Purchase of iBook
3. Mutual reconciliation with Alex

MARCH
1. Hung Yong Birthday@Magic Wok and Paulaner Brahuas
2. The return of Julia Ng

APRIL
1. Hospitalisation of my grandmom
2. Mr Singapore 2004
3. Exam Period

MAY
1. Being selected in some competition
2. Memorable trip to Bangkok and Pattaya
3. Pass all subjects

JUNE - the most stressful month
1. Singapore Idol Audition
2. Death of Damien
3. Kien Birthday@Fong Seng
4. Samuel Birthday@pool
5. Kuala Lumpur trip with Kent
6. Lost of camera

JULY
1. Activation of my friends to vote me
2. The competition itself
3. Trip to Samy Muthu restaurant
4. First haircut at hair salon
5. Presence of Lincoln@Welcome Carnival
6. The Mean Girls movie
7. NAtional Day preview with Beelan, Medallyn and Denyse

AUGUST
1. Lily Birthday celebration@Fish n Co.
2. Singapore Idol telecast

SEPTEMBER
1. Fall out with some people
2. Attended Army Open House@Safti with Lily
3. My blog under attack

October - Ugly month
1. My blog under attack by anonymous visitors
2. First ear pierce
3. Visit airport with Ffour in wee morning
4. Death of my cousin to cancer
5. introduction of Lily to my best friends

NOVEMBER- the most depressing month
1. Submission of FYP
2. Mugging till 4am plus preparation of FYP
3. Exam period
4. Send my mum to A&E at Alexander Hospital
5. Visit to Chek Jawa at Pulau Ubin
6. FYP presentation on exam period
7. Last gathering of Ffour at Alley bar
8. Send Hung Yong off to Beijing

DECEMBER
1. A visit to wine company at Hollan Road and visit to Brewerkz
2. Halizah Birthday
3. My sister grand wedding
4. California Fitness Center re-visit
5. Tsunamis Attack in Asia

I was so bored today and all I received was birthday greeting from friends. I need to go out and celebrate my birthday because it hardly falls on weekend. Everyone seems no interested in going out tonight because it is raining and I do not have transport. I spent whole evening watching TV. Anxiety starts to surge whole body when time reaches 12 am,Julia call me and we have a great conversation and she forgets my birthday.Anyway, she sounds so chirpy. How I wish she stay a little bit longer to celebrate my birthday.Julia, I am sure to visit you in Hong Kong. I am just nearly given up hope to go out until I manage to contact Derek, the yoga instructor. I wait for my sister to come back at 12.30am. I do my own countdown and it is so lame. No birthday cake or candles to blow .

I fetch him at Jurong West near Yuhua Secondary school but he tell me to go to quieter place as he need some moments to talk. Coinicdently, my playlist was playing sad songs and that does not help much for this kind of situation. He let out the tears, and I feel quite awkward though. We went to Kent Ridge Park and let him see the beautiful scenery, hopefully he can be consoled by the beauty of nature. Then he start to talk about his problems regarding his sister and mother. He does not get any respect from them for what he is. I feel for him, just being there to give a listening ear. he felt better after that. We went to Fong Seng to had supper. I ordered Nasi Lemak and shared it together. Then I sent him back home. Even though, it was short meeting, I learnt something from him that he start young to face such tough life experiences and he had to handle it well. I am blessed and lucky at the moment. I respect him for him being himself.Do not take life for granted.

I reach home at 3am, and I got a present from my sister, wrapped with shimmering gold. Very glamourous. The birthday message is just so sweet-coated. It almost put me in tears. Why must I start my new year with tears?It writes:

Dear Brother
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
Firstly, would like to express my gratitude for contributing to the success of my/our wedding.
Secondly, would like say sorry lah, this year's budget is very low.Got you two gift though.One of them import far :P
Lastly, have fun.Hope you'll get what you want to achieve or wish this year.

Your 1 and only sister.