I woke up late, purposely. Suddenly I received a call from NTU, I guessed it must be my supervisor.I quickly dressed up and rushed to school, not even having any breakfast.reached the laboratory at 10.30am.My supervisor seems to show his disappointed and anger look. While I took off my equipment, Agness passed me a letter from my supervisor.It read - I should come early to do my experiment, and i can do my experiment even after office hour.I felt so pissed off.I just felt like taking the chair and hit all those bulky equipments and died.At the point of lowest level of hope, I got hit by more events again.It was really a multiple blow for me.
1) i received two hate mails from my supervisor regarding my lateness.
You don't need to wait for me to begin your project. You can do what I have told you before.
I cannot do anything together with you.
If you cannot come on Tuesday, you don't need to ask me to book autolab on Tuesday for you as the instrument is very busy.By the way, this is your FYP project, not mine. I told you how to do before I left for China.It is your responsibility if you fail.
I was quite hurtful when I received the emails, whether I should blame myself for being irresponsible and lazy student?
2) I got bitchy comments by a good friend regarding my trip earlier. I was so tired to think about it or even reply to his comments.Worse, i even read his blog regarding me.When he start treating me like a good friend? Yes, I am bad guy, always.But I had my life of own.I own it.
3) When I had late lunch at 2pm. I had to say hi, with my best fake smile to those who know me.I even saw MPE students wearing their graduation gowns with their good friends,taking pictures with one another and together.It really made me feel very remorsed and envious.I could not even take pictures with my good friends and others whom i know.I felt so low.I really need someone who can just listen to my woes. Am I regret for the consequence i face or the destiny I lead on my own?
Today was a last day of unlucky june.Here were the list of the bad experiences I had:
1) Final year project screw-up
2) Knew that I was not being selected for top 10 position
3) Pressurized to tell my mum about my one more semester stay and hate to see her disappointment
4) My debts keep increasing and worse no even had money to pay my bills.
5) Subject Registration screw-up and pending at the moment
6) A good friend's death
7) My cousin's fight with cancer now
8) Fall out with certain friends
9) Getting bigger size due to stress
10) Losing Digital Camera
I don't always get what i want.or maybe God might have a better plan.or I just had low esteem that make me believe that i could noot accomplsih anything.I should start to re-examine all I had been toold,dismiss what insults my soul.I know that I had choices.I can stay where I am and do nothing about my unluckiness, putting up with unacceptable conditions.Or i can take a chance and begin to change the things that are not working in my life, knwoing that is the only way to grow.I should have my own affirmations now.
Maybe I worried too much, which drained my energy and leave me depressed and uninspired.Affirmations are an excellent way to get rid of worry and fear thoughts.I just need God to guide me the way. And I miss Him.
1) i received two hate mails from my supervisor regarding my lateness.
You don't need to wait for me to begin your project. You can do what I have told you before.
I cannot do anything together with you.
If you cannot come on Tuesday, you don't need to ask me to book autolab on Tuesday for you as the instrument is very busy.By the way, this is your FYP project, not mine. I told you how to do before I left for China.It is your responsibility if you fail.
I was quite hurtful when I received the emails, whether I should blame myself for being irresponsible and lazy student?
2) I got bitchy comments by a good friend regarding my trip earlier. I was so tired to think about it or even reply to his comments.Worse, i even read his blog regarding me.When he start treating me like a good friend? Yes, I am bad guy, always.But I had my life of own.I own it.
3) When I had late lunch at 2pm. I had to say hi, with my best fake smile to those who know me.I even saw MPE students wearing their graduation gowns with their good friends,taking pictures with one another and together.It really made me feel very remorsed and envious.I could not even take pictures with my good friends and others whom i know.I felt so low.I really need someone who can just listen to my woes. Am I regret for the consequence i face or the destiny I lead on my own?
Today was a last day of unlucky june.Here were the list of the bad experiences I had:
1) Final year project screw-up
2) Knew that I was not being selected for top 10 position
3) Pressurized to tell my mum about my one more semester stay and hate to see her disappointment
4) My debts keep increasing and worse no even had money to pay my bills.
5) Subject Registration screw-up and pending at the moment
6) A good friend's death
7) My cousin's fight with cancer now
8) Fall out with certain friends
9) Getting bigger size due to stress
10) Losing Digital Camera
I don't always get what i want.or maybe God might have a better plan.or I just had low esteem that make me believe that i could noot accomplsih anything.I should start to re-examine all I had been toold,dismiss what insults my soul.I know that I had choices.I can stay where I am and do nothing about my unluckiness, putting up with unacceptable conditions.Or i can take a chance and begin to change the things that are not working in my life, knwoing that is the only way to grow.I should have my own affirmations now.
Maybe I worried too much, which drained my energy and leave me depressed and uninspired.Affirmations are an excellent way to get rid of worry and fear thoughts.I just need God to guide me the way. And I miss Him.
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