Firstly,It began as not such a great day to have a weekend.The rain was so intense that there was flooding somewhere in Singapore.I did not even enjoy my weekends like last year.I feel like I'm silently screaming for help and no one pays any attention of tries to hear me.I can't control anything anymore. It's all out to get me!I felt strong surge of loneliness. I just stared blankly at the ceiling.I felt empty inside.I better put more sunshine in my blog with hope and inspiration.If God send me one angel....Guess He did.My beloved cat greeted me with sweet purr and warm rub against my leg.Is it the time to look for love? Guess not.

Loneliness had been my best friend, for years. Trusting me to make judgements and allowing me to follow my own path was already a mistake.Days gradually changed from freedom to restriction. Staying positive is sometimes hard. Emotions feel different somehow. Wishing for past days when I was carefree without trying so hard. Some days the way I was felt fake. Having to think so much just to stay strong.Hah!. But I wouldn't want the negativity I've felt in the past haunted me in present times.


Loneliness used to be just a word. Now it is a part of me on sad days. But I won't regret this feeling. At least when I'm lonely, the feeling is real. I am revealing raw emotions. My true self even if others can't see it. Being myself.................................................

There's this fear
That lives inside of me
It's my companion
And at once
I love it and I hate it
It's loneliness you see
This fear inside of me
And I want it gone
But I also want it to stay
How does one conquer this
Invisible force
I cannot want it
And yet I do
Conflicting views
Yet they are a comfort
I need someone to call
My own
But there's no-one
'Cause no-one can see my soul
"Help!" I cry out in despair
But I'm not heard
And everyone just walks by
I'm guessing this is my destiny
My forever
And one day
Not far from now
My final cry will come
Not in vain
Because it will remove my life -
The stain