Feeling blue

Today horoscope read:
Avoid travel if possible and unnecessary arguments and discussions today. A budding romance is on the horizon for the single Capricorn. An old friend could come knocking on your door unexpectedly, bringing wonderful, nostalgic memories., but a senior relative could be particularly demanding

seems that I would be alone on sunday.A friend asked me to go Sentosa but somehow I rejected the idea cos I was still trying, strongly to get my body back in shape.I did not wish to make fool of myself with flabs and fats all around my body at the beach.I went to HMV at Orchard Rd to listen to music.It was so hard to see so many people and couples around while I was all damn alone, somehow I felt inadequate.I really hated festive season.I might have suffered "festive blues'' - The period which is usually associated with happiness, so feeling of loneliness and isolation are amplified if one can't share same happiness.

What makes everyone including me lonely:
1) You can be trying to gulp down a dinner after work when you see a group of friends at one corner of restaurant laughing away at someone's jokes and having a good time
2) A scene from a movie can spark off some memory of a good time in the past which you enjoyed with friends, but now makes you feel lonely
3)You can be at MRT station and see a couple exchanging gifts with smile on their faces
4)You can picture in your head a group of friends coming together, toasting each other in anticipation of the New Year.

Loneliness happens more often during festive season because everywhere,everyone goes big on spreading the love.Well, the important thing is to acknowledge the mood and move on after the initial period of sadness.I don't want the day when I can't sleep, can't eat and feel guilty or hopeless until I might attempt suicide.Scary!!!!

I guess I will give a chance to me to bring and spread joy and happiness to others instead of searching for solution.I may even ease my own pain.Any comments??